Only With You
by Bella4000
Summary: Sequel to Framed Jane! Jane and Maura have to recover from their ordeal with Hoyt, but especially Maura who is particularly new to being a victim of and being harmed by a serial killer such as Hoyt. Rizzles. Give it a chance! (But read Framed Jane first.) Rated M for language.
1. Chapter 1

**Hey everyone! So I hope you are all still with me, and I'm sorry it took a month to get this up! But here it is, the sequel to Framed Jane! My second story ever! I hope I don't disappoint :P I wanted to get it up before the season 6 premiere so have been trying hard to find time to write. I have also started another R &I story which I am hoping to publish soon, but I've got some thinking to do on that one. Anyway, if any of you readers from Framed Jane are still with me then here's the start of the sequel and I hope you enjoy! For any new readers, I would recommend reading Framed Jane first. **

**So here goes! *gulp* please review and let me know your thoughts! I really want to know what you guys think of this first chapter. And I forgot to say this at the end of Framed Jane, but thank you so much for all of your alerts and reviews and support for Framed Jane! It meant the world to me as a new writer and I hope I don't disappoint with the sequel! Enjoy :)**

 **Chapter 1:**

Three days. It had been three days since Jane had woken up and still she knew very little about the extent of Maura's injuries. Her mother, Korsak, Frost, even Frankie wouldn't talk about it with her. She suspected they thought that she wouldn't be able to handle it but Jane knew that she could.

Two days ago, the day after she had woken up she had tried to get out of bed to see Maura since she hadn't been told a thing. She fainted from the pain, much to her embarrassment. When she came to her mother was sitting by her bedside and had told Jane that Maura was alive. Jane remembered that overwhelming relief as clear as day but it was short lived as she realised why her family and friends were so reluctant to talk about Maura at that stage.

 _Because she is less ok than what they want me to believe,_ Jane thought bitterly. She understood their reasons for not telling her but it hurt that they thought that Jane wasn't strong enough to handle it. After everything she and Maura had been through… _that's exactly why they're not telling you._ The logical part of Jane's brain said. Jane sighed, frustrated, then winced. It still hurt to take a deep breath. While Jane was lucky with her injuries and the stab wound in her abdomen hadn't ruptured anything vital or done any permanent damage, it had still caused a bit of damage and as a result of her also having trouble to breathe normally Jane was being forced to start physical and respiratory therapy tomorrow. Something that she was not looking forward to. Jane put her head back on the pillows and closed her eyes, remembering the panic she had felt when she woke up.

 _Three days ago:_

Jane woke up confused and disorientated. There was a bright light shining down on her and she closed her eyes to block it out. She felt someone take her hand and start to rub it lightly. Confused, Jane tried to open her eyes again, squinting at the light as her eyes adjusted to it. She looked to her left to the person that was holding her hand and saw that it was her mum.

"Hey baby." Angela said. Jane tried to say something but her eyes grew wide as she found that she couldn't speak. Seeing the questions and panic in Jane's eyes, Angela tried to reassure her daughter.

"Jane it's ok. You're in the hospital. There's a tube down your throat to help you breathe, which is why you can't talk." Angela paused to give Jane time to absorb this, who in her groggy state was still trying to make sense of it all. Why was she in the hospital? And why did she need help breathing? And where was Maura, who was always by her side whenever Jane got injured. When she had shot herself and in turn Bobby to save her brother, and before that when she had been captured by Hoyt for the first time… _Oh shit!_ Suddenly it came back to her in a rush. Why Jane was in the hospital and it was her mother sitting beside her, not Maura. But then… _oh my god, where's Maura?_ _How badly did Hoyt actually hurt her? Was she…no. She can't be._ Panicking now Jane tried to sit up but gasped at the pain that shot through her stomach.

"Jane. Jane honey its ok, you're safe now." Angela said as Jane began to panic. The older woman could see the desperation and worry and panic plain on Jane's face. Jane tried to sit up but immediately fell back against the pillows. Angela choked back tears as she saw the pain on Jane's face, trying to stay strong. Angela suspected that part of Jane's panic was to do with wanting to know about Maura and fear of what may have happened to her, but at the moment Jane wasn't in any state to talk about that. The monitors that Jane was wired too started beeping loudly. Angela pressed the button to call for the nurse and grasped the hand she was holding more firmly.

"Jane." She said sternly, but not harshly. It was enough for Jane to calm down a little and look at her. Angela softened her voice again. "Jane, you need to calm down. Honey please." Jane heard the plea in her voice and tried to calm down, tried to relax. She was aching to know about Maura, to know if she was ok or not. Jane needed to see her, to talk to her, anything that was proof that Maura had been found with Jane and was still alive. Suddenly the door opened and a nurse walked in, interrupting Jane's thoughts.

"Hello." She said, greeting both Rizzoli's. Turning to Jane, "I see you're awake, Ms. Rizzoli. My name is Rachel Lars and I'll be your day nurse while you are here. If you could just wait a moment, I'll get the doctor." Rachel said. She quickly checked Jane's vitals and seemingly satisfied rushed back out the room. Not a minute later she returned, this time joined by the doctor.

"Good to see you awake, Ms Rizzoli. My name is Doctor Caldwell, but you may call me James if you wish." Aware that Jane couldn't respond he didn't wait for a reply and instead moved around to the right side of the bed and pulled out a small torch, turning it on and flicking it over Jane's eyes. Jane in turn couldn't help but squinting at the bright light. Satisfied, Dr Caldwell walked over and picked up the chart on the end of the bed, noting something down. He then checked her vitals, like the nurse had and wrote on the chart again before putting it back on the end of the bed.

"Do you know where you are?" He asked. Jane nodded.

"Do you know why you're here?" Hesitantly, Jane nodded, the memory of what happened still fresh and raw in her mind. "That's good. You took a bit of a beating to your head and as a result it's possible you have a mild concussion, however so far you are showing no signs of one but we will still monitor it over the next few days, just in case." Another pause. Another nod. "I presume your mother has explained to you that you have a tube down your throat to assist your breathing." He looked to Angela questioningly, and Angela nodded. "Good. Now that you're awake I'm going to remove it. Nurse Rachel?" He looked over at her and Rachel nodded, already ready for what the doctor was going to do. "Ok Jane. May I call you Jane?" Another nod from Jane. "Ok Jane, when I remove the tube it is going to hurt, but when I tell you to take as deep a breath as you can, ok?" Jane nodded again. "Ready? Take a breath now Jane." Jane took as deep a breath as she could manage without too much pain but almost screamed as the tube was ripped out of her throat. She then struggled to breathe.

"Janie come on. Take another breath and cough if you have to, that's it. I know it hurts baby." Angela said, close to tears as she squeezed Jane's hand while she struggled to breathe. After a few seconds though Jane managed to take a breath and started to cough, after which her breathing evened out.

"Maura…" she managed to gasp. Her voice was much hoarser than usual from lack of use and her mildly damaged throat. Angela's eyes welled up with tears. She knew this was coming, but it still hurt to see Jane like this, so injured but also so worried and panicked for Maura.

"Jane now's not the time. You need to rest honey." Sensing that he wouldn't get much more out of his patient now Dr Caldwell signaled to the nurse. Turning to Angela,

"I'll be back in about three hours to check how she is going. In the meantime Nurse Rachel will check in every half hour." He said.

"Ok, thankyou Dr." Angela replied as he left. The nurse then injected another dose of pain medication before following the doctor out.

"No Ma…" she whispered as she felt the medication taking effect. "Need to know…Maur…" was Jane's final words as she drifted into sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey guys, SOOOOOO sorry it took so long to get the next chapter up! I know there really should be no excuse! But as some of you probably know life often (and very inconveniently) gets in the way of things such as getting over knee surgery, uni exams, starting a new job etc.**

 **I am extremely sorry, I myself know how annoying it can be to wait a month or more for an update so I promise I will try my very best to update more often and get into a regular pattern, now that I have a few weeks off uni (holidays! Yay!)**

 **Anyway, enough rambling from me! One more quick note though, thank you to everyone who has reviewed and followed and favourited this story so far! I really hope to get more reviews, they really do inspire me but just enjoy the update and let me know your thoughts/opinions.**

 **Cheers guys! :D**

 **Disclaimer: (since I haven't done one yet for this story or Framed Jane): The characters don't belong to me, they belong to Tess Gerritsen, Jan Nash and TNT. The plot/story line however belongs to me :)**

 **Chapter 2:**

 _"NOOOO!" Jane screamed, tears running down her face. Her arms were spread out to the sides and her feet were stretched out in front of her._

 _"No! Please…" Jane begged, unsure of whether she could take any more pain. Hoyt had already pinned her right hand down with a scalpel, driven through the middle of her palm and was readying her left hand now to do the same. Hoyt just sneered at her, an awful, gleefully evil look in his eyes as he brought the scalpel down._

 _"AGHHHHHHH!" Jane screamed until her throat was so hoarse that it felt like it was on fire, which was nothing compared to the pain from her hands. The slightest movement of any part of her body had her wanting to scream from pain, but somehow she managed to hold back. Just. Hoyt stood up and loomed over her, admiring his work so far._

 _"You sick son of a bitch bastard." Jane whispered. Hoyt only laughed then knelt down right beside her head and spoke quietly, menacingly._

 _"Oh Jane. This is the only the beginning. Soon your good doctor will be here with us, and that's when the party will really get going."_

 _"Nooo! Hoyt, don't you touch her! Hoyt!" Jane screamed and yelled, trying to ignore every pain in her body as Hoyt walked away with his usual swagger. Eventually Jane gave up the yelling and just lied there, with eyes closed, panting and trying to calm the rage in her mind while also trying to not focus on the pain, which of course made her more aware of the dull throbbing in her palms._

 _Possibly hours later Hoyt walked back in, except this time he had someone with him. Jane craned her neck slightly to see and gasped. Even before he removed the sack over the person's face, Jane knew who it was._

 _"No…Maura…"_

 _Hoyt bound her to a chair nailed to the floor, removed the sack and grinned as Maura blinked at the dim light, getting her bearings. When she finally spotted Jane on the floor, palms literally nailed to the ground she started to cry._

 _"Time to say your farewells to the good doctor, Jane." Hoyt said. As quick as lightning he pulled out a knife and stabbed Maura, hilt deep right in her heart._

 _"NOOOOOO!" Jane screamed._

"NOOOOO!" Jane screamed and bolted upright, panting heavily, fresh tears on her cheeks. The bathroom door opened and Angela came rushing out at her daughter's scream.

"Jane, honey, is everything ok?" She said, then took in the look on Jane's face and sat down on the edge of the bed.

"It was a nightmare, wasn't it?" She asked quietly. Jane nodded, not trusting herself to speak.

"It's going to be ok Jane, I promise. Maura's going to be ok. You'll see." Angela said and took one of her daughter's hands. Jane involuntarily flinched, a reaction from the nightmare. Angela noticed.

"I'm sorry Ma. It's not you. It's…" Jane said, frustrated, trying to find the right words. The pain in Jane's eyes broke Angela's heart. How much could one person take? Or rather, how much could two best friends take? Everything in Jane and Maura's lives had been a battle. Angela knew all about Maura's childhood and her adoption and couldn't stop wondering how such a caring, loving person could have been so lonely and miserable, and even still is at times. She has watched Jane fight for her life in hospital more than once. And now this. Then Jane, who has suffered all the torment Maura has and possibly more and now has to watch Maura suffer what Jane herself has suffered numerous times. Angela met Jane's gaze and took her other hand, holding both of Jane's hands in hers.

"Janie, you are strong. And so is Maura. She will pull through, you both will. I know that for a fact. But another thing I also know is that you can't do it alone." Angela held up a hand to stop Jane's protest. "Please, let me finish Jane. Maura needs you as much as you need Maura, Jane, whether you know it or not, whether you believe it or not doesn't matter because it's the truth. It seems that everyone except you and Maura are willing to fully acknowledge it. But this time, it's different, because you and Maura need to help each other through the nightmares and the tears and the pain that is sure to come, and I know it will because I've seen you go through it before. We all have. But I want you to know that you're not alone in this. Me, Maura, Frankie, Tommy, Frost, Korsak…we're your family Jane and we're here to support you. I'm telling you all of this now, early on in hope that it will make things a bit easier for you later on."

Jane started at her mother, openly crying, completely speechless. After a moment she leaned forward as much as she could and wrapped herself around her mother. Angela hugged her tightly back.

"Thank you Ma." Jane whispered, her voice thick with emotion. They stayed like that for a while, mother and daughter holding each other tightly before breaking apart. Jane wiped the back of her hand across her eyes.

"Now, how about a game of cards?" Angela said, and to lighten the mood she pulled a deck out from her bag. Jane smiled as she began to deal the cards.

"Thanks Ma. For everything." Jane said as she picked up her cards.

"You're welcome." Angela whispered in reply.

* * *

They played cards for a while, with Angela having very little success. Jane smiled and laughed at her mother's jokes, appreciating her efforts to make Jane feel better. It was working, to a degree, but it didn't make her stop thinking about Maura. She was so worried. She could remember most of what happened, but there were still a couple of fuzzy memories and Jane was scared for Maura. She still hadn't been told the full extent of Maura's injuries, only that she was alive. She was going crazy not knowing but every time she mentioned it the topic was changed and she could tell that her family thought that she was too fragile right now to handle it. _As if,_ Jane thought. Whatever news it was, no matter how good or bad Jane wanted to know.

"Jane. Jane?"

"Huh? Sorry?" Jane asked, blinking.

"I was just saying that it's your turn." Angela said, slightly puzzled. Jane sighed and put her cards down before sitting up a bit more.

"Ma, I need to know. It's been five days since I woke up and I've barely been told anything outside of my own injuries and needs. How is Maura?" Jane asked, looking her right in the eyes.

"Jane, please. Not now. I'm not ready to…you're not ready…"

"Ma, please!" Jane interrupted, giving Angela a stern look. Angela looked down at the cards she was still holding, suddenly unable to meet her daughter's gaze. "I've tried to be patient for everyone's sake, which you know isn't easy for me but now I'm sick of it. I'm sick of not knowing, Ma, and it's driving me crazy! You said I wasn't alone in this, that you and everyone are there for me, to support me and help me. If that's true, then please stop holding out on me and just tell me what's going on! Maura is my best friend Ma and I swear if you don't tell me right now how she really is then I am going to get out of this bed and go see her myself, no matter what the doctors say, no matter the pain." Jane's voice had slowly risen until she was full shouting. Someone cleared their throat from the door and Jane turned her head to see Frankie standing there, looking slightly embarrassed that he had overheard her outburst but he was also looking at her sympathetically.

"Frankie!" Angela said and got up to greet her son, silently thanking the heavens that he had arrived when he did.

"Hey Ma." He said, kissing Angela on the cheek.

"Jane." Frankie said in greeting, smiling, even though he knew that Jane saw through his façade.

"Frankie, please." Jane whispered. Frankie took a deep breath and nodded. Angela sat back down while Frankie remained standing.

"Jane, Maura's suffered several slashes across her abdomen, third degree burns on her arms and a severe concussion from a beating to her face." Frankie surmised, and paused to let Jane take it in.

"Oh god…" Jane whispered. "Is she…has she woken up yet?" Jane asked, and noticed the glance Frankie gave Angela.

"What? What is it?"

"She has woken up briefly, yes. But…Jane, she…she didn't remember what had happened or why she was in the hospital. She was really confused but also distressed because she couldn't understand why no one would tell her why she was here or how she got her injuries." Frankie explained and noticed tears running down his sister's cheeks. He moved to sit on the edge of the bed, on the opposite side to Angela. He placed a hand over Jane's tightly clenched hands and waited patiently for her to speak. He could see the thoughts and emotions running through her mind.

"Why? Why can't she remember?" Jane asked quietly in her raspy voice, looking at Frankie. She already suspected the answer but she wanted it confirmed.

"The doctor said that he thinks it is from temporary amnesia. She can't remember the event because it was so traumatising and shocking, and adding to that the severe concussion…" Frankie trailed off, not needing to finish. Jane nodded, her suspicions confirmed. She sat quietly for another few minutes, thinking. Coming to a decision (which really shouldn't have been a decision at all) she looked first at Frankie then at her mother.

"I want to see Maura." Jane declared.

* * *

 ** _In another hospital room_**

It was darkness. Complete darkness. Quick flashes kept crossing her vision, almost like pictures sprinting past, too quick for her to get a proper look at them. She could vaguely hear someone talking to her, but it was faint and she had to strain to hear if the voice was actually real. She went towards it, hoping it was the right direction and as she got closer the voice got louder until suddenly she was gasping for air, bright lights shining down on her with loud noises surrounding her. She squinted her eyes and could just make out the shape of her mother standing next to her.

"Wha…?" She tried to ask but found that her voice was muffled by something covering her mouth. _An oxygen mask? But why?_ Maura thought. She tried to move but gasped at the pain that shot through her whole body. Involuntarily she whimpered. She tried to remove the mask to ask where she was, what happened, why she was in so much pain but a hand over hers stopped her.

"I am sorry Dr Isles but for now you need the oxygen mask to help you breathe." A man's voice said. _Help me breathe? Why?_ Maura started to panic now as her brain failed to supply the answers she so desperately wanted and needed. As her eyes started to become more focused she could see not only the doctor who had spoken but at least two nurses in the room with him plus her mother, who was seated in an armchair next to her bed.

Constance, in turn could see many questions in her daughter's eyes. She grasped one of her hands.

"Maura, darling, you are in the hospital. You have been severely injured." She said. Maura's eyes widened and it seemed that she now had more questions than before. She started to look around frantically and even tried to sit up, at which point the nurses rushed forward and gently pushed her back down again. This time though Maura managed to remove the mask and the doctor nodded at the nurses, signalling that it was ok for a minute or so.

"What? Why? What happened? Where's Jane? What injuries did I sustain? And by whom? And where? Was there anyone else involved? Which hospital am I at?" Maura paused, gasping for breath and one of the nurses placed the oxygen mask back on and helped her to get control of her breathing again. Constance closed her eyes and clenched her fists, a very unusual gesture for a normally so calm and collected person. But it broke her heart to see her only daughter like this. Constance never, ever imagined in her wildest dreams that she would be sitting here like this after Maura was almost killed by a psychopathic serial killer. Tears slipped down her cheeks and she hastily wiped them away, not wanting Maura to see how upset she was. Opening her eyes again Maura had managed to gain control of her breathing again. Once again Constance grabbed one of her daughter's hands in her own, the nurses having moved away to talk with the doctor.

"Sweetie, it's going to be ok. _You_ are going to be ok and I'll be right here with you the whole time, ok?" Constance nodded, and was rewarded with a smile from Maura. She saw Dr Caldwell motioning to her and she nodded at him slightly.

"I'll be right back, ok darling?" Constance said. "Try to get some more rest." She squeezed Maura's hand and watched as she started to drift off into sleep again before getting up to meet the doctor.


	3. Chapter 3

**Hey guys! First of all, thank you so much for the reviews and follows and favourites! It does mean a lot to me. So here is the next chapter! Also, as jjswinnlive (sorry, for some reason it wouldn't let me save if I added the '.com')** **suggested I am spending more time on this story, trying to develop it more and planning out future chapters. Hopefully I can get out two updates next week, but I'll see how I go. So about this chapter: it was really hard to write, which is why it is so short (so apologies for that). I was hesitant to post it because I wasn't sure if I was rushing things a bit or not at the end, but on the other hand it felt like the right way to go when I was writing it. I know I haven't properly addressed any of the real issues or heavy stuff yet from what happened with Hoyt, but I promise it's coming soon!**

 **So here's the next chapter, and as always please review with your thoughts/opinions! :)**

 **Chapter 3:**

Jane waited impatiently outside Maura's room. She had been given the all clear by Dr Caldwell to see Maura. Now she was waiting for him to open the door, because he had insisted on checking Maura's vitals first. She had woken up properly yesterday and the doctor and nurses were still monitoring her very closely, however she had already been taken off the ventilator. Jane sighed, impatient, anxious and nervous. She had no idea why she was anxious and nervous, it was stupid really because this was _Maura_. At least her mother and Constance wouldn't be there. _Thank god_ , Jane thought. The Dr hadn't been surprised that Jane wanted to see Maura and once that he said it was ok, Angela had immediately promised Jane that she and Constance would make themselves scarce.

The door opened and Dr Caldwell walked out.

"Well?" Jane asked.

"You can see her, yes. And she is awake. Although if you could please refrain from doing or saying anything that might make her distressed as she is still have difficulty breathing at times."

"Not a problem Dr," Jane replied. The Dr nodded and opened the door so she could wheel herself in. Even though her physical and respiratory therapy was going well and she was making faster progress than anyone thought she would, Dr Caldwell had still insisted that Jane use a wheelchair to see Maura this time, despite that their rooms were only down the hall from each other.

When Jane entered the room she gasped at the sight of Maura. Never in her life had she seen her best friend like this. So much paler than normal, she was skinnier because she had lost weight from lack of proper food and movement and add to that the wires and bandages on her body…Jane's eyes eventually met Maura's hazel ones and for a moment nothing needed to be said. All their thoughts, feelings and emotions seemed to be conveyed just from that one look.

"You're crying." Maura said softly.

"I am?" Jane said and wiped a finger just below her left eye to find that she was indeed crying. Jane looked up at Maura and smiled. Slowly she got up from the wheelchair and walked over to sit on the edge of Maura's bed.

"I'm so sorry." Jane whispered, just loud enough to be audible. She was playing with her hands, a nervous habit. Maura laid a hand over Jane's to stop her fiddling. Jane smiled at that and glanced up at Maura.

"Jane, you have nothing to be sorry about it. What happened was not your fault, do you understand me? I don't blame you for anything and I have nothing to blame you for, anyway. I need you Jane Rizzoli." Maura said, whispering the last part. Jane leaned down and hugged her tightly. Maura returned the hug, both women now crying. Not much had been said, yet everything had already been said and understood. Both women could read the thoughts and emotions in the other one's eyes and they had conveyed what they wanted to say other, at least for now anyway. Eventually they pulled away and took another moment to collect themselves again, Maura breathing heavier than Jane.

"God, that's the second hug I've given today." Jane laughed. Maura smiled at her, still breathing a little too heavy from the sobbing to be able to laugh. It felt good to see Jane, to laugh and smile with her, even if she had only been awake for a day. For Jane it had been almost a full week. But for both of them, it felt…no, it _had_ been a lot longer than that since they had been able to just spend some time together, to just relax and have fun. Yet while they were smiling and laughing now, both of them knew that they still had a long road ahead of them.

"So…how much do you actually remember?" Jane asked once she had stopped laughing. Maura racked her mind, trying to remember what she could from what had happened.

"Most of it is hazy, but I remember waking up in a strange place. And Hoyt…Hoyt was there." Maura said and squeezed her eyes shut at the memory. "He…made a small incision on my neck." She continued and unconsciously raised a hand to the small bandage that was covering the wound. "Then I remember him taunting me about you before he knocked me out again." Maura now had tears running down her cheeks and she opened her eyes to see Jane looking at her, a mixture of sympathy and sorrow and pain and fear in her eyes. Jane took a shaky breathy and placed her hands over Maura's, stroking them lightly with her thumbs much like Maura always does for Jane whenever her hands hurt from anxiety. Maura smiled slightly at the comfort the small gesture gave her. Jane didn't say anything else; she didn't push Maura into talking about it, something that Maura was grateful for. It took a few moments but eventually Maura had gathered herself enough to tell Jane the rest.

"After Hoyt knocked me out the second time, I remember waking up to see you…"

 _She felt groggy and disorientated. She heard Jane's voice calling to her and slowly opened her eyes, asking if it was actually Jane or not. Her insides jumped a little as wide brown eyes met hers. She felt totally exhausted and drained. She didn't know what Hoyt had injected her with, but whatever it was, it was affecting her badly. After a few minutes she felt the grogginess wear off and she opened her eyes a bit wider to take in her surroundings, now that she could focus more clearly. As her eyes met Jane's again she felt an understanding pass between them; that no matter what, they were going to get out of this alive. They were not going to fall victims to Hoyt again. Jane must have also somehow read her mind because she suddenly said,_

 _"I don't know where we are Maura." She then heard a door slam and braced herself as Hoyt and a man, Zach she remembered his name was (she remembered him from the lab back at BPD) walked in."_

Maura paused to catch her breath as she relayed the flash back to Jane. She had closed her eyes again as she remembered, not wanting to see the pain on Jane's face that Maura knew would be there.

"The last thing I remember is Hoyt tasering you on the shoulder. After that it's all really hazy and hard to make out." Maura whispered. She opened her eyes and realised she was crying again. Jane pulled her to her chest and rubbed her back soothingly as Maura sobbed, barely holding back her own tears. Eventually Maura pulled a back and accepting a tissue from Jane, wiped her eyes dry.

"Thankyou." She said, looking down at her hands. Jane put a finger under her chin and lifted her face so that they were looking directly at each other's eyes. The intensity of Jane's gaze startled Maura and she suddenly realised how close their faces were.

"Maur...I missed you so much." Jane whispered. The low tone of her husky voice sent shivers down Maura's spine.

"I know Jane. But I'm glad you're with me now." Maura replied in an equally low tone. Jane raised a hand and rested it on Maura's cheek, lightly stroking it with her thumb. Maura's breath hitched in her throat. It wasn't until a few months ago that she started to realise her feelings for Jane, and even then she brushed it off as being just a crush she thought she had because she couldn't seem to keep a boyfriend, or a partner for that matter. But the more she ignored her feelings the more they intensified until she could no longer deny that she was in love with Detective Jane Rizzoli, her best friend. Yet Maura knew that there was no way that Jane felt the same way, even in the slightest so she never said anything. Until now.

Maura scooted closer to Jane, grimacing as she did so, until their lips were only inches apart. Jane sucked in a breath as she moved her hand down Maura's face so that her thumb was brushing Maura's lips. Jane had always been unsure, and even a little scared of her feelings for Maura that had developed soon after they first met. As time went on she knew that what she felt for her best friend was real but she could never admit it to anyone. As silly as it was, Jane had been scared of what the others at the precinct and her family would think if she dated Maura. She had also been scared of rejection by Maura because she didn't think that Maura would return her feelings. But now? Now there was no doubt in Jane's mind.

"I love you Maura." She said in a low voice, so low that it was barely a whisper. Without a second thought she crashed her lips against Maura's. Maura returned the kiss with just as much passion. They explored each other's mouths and lips, the fury increasing as all of their pent up emotions and feelings for each other poured out. Reluctantly Maura placed her hands against Jane's stomach and gently pushed her back, wary of her injury. Fighting to catch her breath and feeling like a lovesick teenager, she smiled crookedly up at Jane, who had an equally big grin on her face.

"I love you too Jane." Maura said.


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey guys! First of all, thank you all so much for the reviews, follows and favourites, it really means a lot and is really encouraging, even if I don't show it. Which brings me to the second thing, SO SO sorry for the once again very delayed update! I can keep making excuses and whatnot as to why it is so delayed, but I'm not going to because I should be more on top of the updates and making sure I get them out on time, and for that I am sorry. But I am going to be posting another chapter tomorrow after work, and maybe even one on Saturday (but I'll confirm that tomorrow).**

 **Also, while this chapter is another light one, things are going to start getting darker and heavier soon.**

 **So anyways, here is the next chapter and as always read, enjoy and please review! :)**

 **Chapter 4:**

After they kissed, Jane and Maura sat together on Maura's bed, watching TV and talking. After a while Maura fell asleep on Jane's shoulder. Not long after Maura was asleep, did Jane fall asleep. The two mothers returned late that afternoon to find their daughters asleep against each other in bed. Angela sighed.

"You know, it's amazing how two people so opposite can be so perfect together." She said to Constance.

"I know. What is that saying, that opposites attract?" Constance replied. Angela smiled.

"Yeah. I'm just so thankful that my Janie met your daughter. If it weren't for Maura…" Angela said. Constance looked over at her.

"I think it's the same for Maura. Her father and I tried to give her a good childhood, but in the end I don't think it was enough. She was always so lonely and had a hard time at school. But when she met Jane, something inside of her changed…for the better. She seemed happier. Less lonely." As Constance talked she noticed tears well up in the other's woman's eyes.

"I also have to thank you, Angela." Angela looked over at Constance with surprise written all over her face.

"Me?" Angela gasped. Constance nodded.

"Yes. You and your family have been so kind to Maura and myself. You accepted her as one of your own and have treated her as such. You never turned your back on her or I and you have always been there to support Maura during the more…challenging parts of her job. It is even thanks to Jane that I have been able to repair my relationship with Maura. So thank you." Angela was now sobbing and Constance, who is not at all the hugging type, pulled Angela in for a hug. She may seem cold and completely detached from emotion at times, but she was still a mother who loved her child and for the first time, she understood the pain that came with having your only daughter mere minutes away from death. When the two women broke apart Angela took a deep shuddering breath and wiped her eyes dry with a tissue.

"Thank you Constance. That means a lot. But I wouldn't have had it any other way. Maura has made such a noticeable difference in Jane's life, for the better, and because they are such close friends it would have been hard to treat Maura any differently than one of my own. You should be proud of your daughter." Angela noticed that Constance was now also crying, a rare sight. Angela offered her a clean tissue and Constance accepted, dabbing her eyes as she cried silently.

"Thank you Angela. You are truly one of the kindest people I have ever met." Constance said softly once she had calmed down. The two women stood in comfortable silence for a while, content to just watch their daughters sleep from the doorway. Eventually Angela lightly tugged on Constance's sleeve and they walked out into the hall, quietly closing the door behind them.

"Come on. I think we both need another coffee while they sleep, and Frankie said that he was bringing the boys by this afternoon so I'll call him to meet us at the hospital café in a half hour." Angela said. Constance only nodded, but Angela smiled at the small movement as the two of them made their way towards the elevators.

* * *

Jane awoke suddenly to the sound of Maura screaming and thrashing around. She grabbed Maura's shoulders and, as gently as she could, forced Maura back down while speaking soothing words.

"Maura, Maura hey, wake up, it's ok, you're safe." Jane softly said. Maura gasped and opened her eyes as she bolted upright. She blinked rapidly until her eyes could focus and ascertain that she was still in the hospital room. She felt a presence and turned to see Jane sitting in bed with her, with one hand placed on Maura's shoulder and a concerned expression on her face.

"Jane?" She asked and reached out a hand. Maura was still very shaken by the dream and felt she needed more physical contact to make sure it had been just that; a dream.

"It's ok Maur. I'm here. You're here. It was just a nightmare." Jane said as she took Maura's outstretched hand, clenching it tightly. She pulled Maura against her and rubbed her back lightly to soothe her. She felt something wet against her top and soon she felt Maura's body shaking with sobs.

"Jane, I…" Maura started, but Jane gently hushed her.

"Shhh, it's ok. You don't have to talk about it now if you don't want to. Talk about it when you're ready." Jane said and placed a soft kiss on Maura's hairline. Within minutes she was asleep again. Jane sighed and leant back against the pillows, still holding Maura in her arms, who shifted slightly in her sleep at Jane's movement. A short time later there was a soft knock on the door, and Dr Caldwell walked in.

"Hi Jane, how are you feeling?" He asked casually. Jane smiled at him.

"I'm feeling a lot better." She replied, still smiling. Dr Caldwell threw her a knowing smile, glancing for a second at Maura asleep in her arms before moving to the side of the bed to check the monitors that were still wired to Maura. Jane chose to ignore his smug look and the glance at Maura.

"Her vitals are stable and are looking good. Has anything happened in the last few hours that might cause a spike in her heart rate?" Dr Caldwell asked as he printed off a chart from the monitor for the last twelve hours.

"The only thing I can think of, at least while I've been with her is a nightmare she had a short while ago. She was screaming and when I calmed her down enough she woke up sweating and panting and really freaked out. But apart from that…" Jane explained.

"Uh huh…then what about this spike here?" Dr Caldwell asked, pointing to a specific time on the chart. Jane blushed furiously.

"Umm…yeah…we kind of…may have…kissed." Jane sputtered, her face burning. The Dr laughed at her reaction, easing the tension that Jane had felt at confessing that private moment between them.

"Don't worry Detective, I've seen and heard a lot worse. And don't worry, I won't tell anyone unless you want me to." Jane breathed a sigh of relief.

"Thank you Dr."

"Please, call me James." James said. Jane felt Maura stir in her arms and looked at her, taking it all in. Oddly enough, Jane wasn't embarrassed at showing affection and love like this for Maura in front of James. Maybe it was because he was a doctor, or maybe it was the patient confidentiality or maybe it was just simply that he didn't care that they were two women in love. Whatever the reason, Jane just stared at Maura's face and all of her features. Her soft skin, her beauty, her elegance and grace, even in sleep. She could have just lay like this forever, with Maura asleep in her arms and Jane just admiring her, but she was interrupted by James, who coughed to get her attention.

"Huh? Sorry." She said sheepishly.

"Don't worry about it." James said, waving a hand. "I truly do hate to interrupt like this, but it is time for your therapy. I'll wait for you outside." He said, and left. Jane sighed and lingered for just a bit longer, running a hand lightly down Maura's cheek before starting to unfurl Maura from herself. As she made to stand up, she heard Maura stir and felt a hand on her wrist.

"Where are you going?" Maura asked sleepily. Jane's heart ached at the longing in Maura's voice but knew she had to go, or she'd be late. And her therapist tended to push her a lot further to her extremes when she was late.

Jane turned around to face Maura and grasped the hand on her wrist, lightly removing it. "I'm sorry Maur, I would stay if I could but I've got therapy." Jane explained. Maura sighed before nodding.

"Ok, I understand. But if anyone visits me before you get back I'm not going to tell them. I want the both of us to be together when they find out." Maura said. Jane smiled brightly and kissed the hand she was holding.

"Sounds good Maur. Now get some more rest and get better, ok? We'll talk later." Jane kissed Maura's hand one more time before placing it gently on the bed. She walked towards the door but before she left she looked back at Maura's sleeping form. _She is really gorgeous. And I am one lucky chick_ , Jane thought, then left.


	5. Chapter 5

**Hey guys, so yet another regrettable delay in posting, but anyway, here it is! Please please review, I really want to hear everyone's thoughts, good or bad, you guys always inspire me to write. So to everyone who has reviewed and who continue to review, thank you so so much! To everyone else, thank you for reading, following and favouriting! But please review.**

 **This is another light chapter, but next chapter it is going to start getting darker.**

 **So yeah, here's the next chapter so read, enjoy and review!**

 **Also, see A/N at the end.**

 **Chapter 5:**

Jane was exhausted by the time she got back to her room. She desperately wanted to see Maura, but the Dr had refused, insisting that she needed her rest. Jane wanted to argue that Maura was the best rest for her but she held her tongue. Arguing wasn't going to get her anywhere when she was a patient at the hospital, as experience had taught her. Even so, James had seen the disappointment on her face and had compromised. At least two to three hours of rest and she could have dinner with Maura. Jane beamed, excited. She would let her mum know because she had a gut feeling that she was bringing everyone around this afternoon. She grabbed her phone off the side table and sent a quick text to Angela before settling back against the pillows. Closing her eyes, she let her mind wander over the day.

At least the physical therapy was going well; when she had left Maura's room that morning, the doctor, much to her relief, hadn't said anything about the fact that she wasn't using the wheelchair. Her therapist agreed that she is now quite capable of walking around on her own, provided she doesn't run, jog or do anything else that might disrupt the injury on her abdomen. Her respiratory therapy was harder, but it had been cut down to three times a week as opposed to everyday. If everything kept going this well, Jane might even be discharged from the hospital at the end of this week. The only downfall was, starting Monday, she was being forced to start seeing a psychologist. Jane groaned at the thought. She knew it was inevitably coming, but she had hoped it wouldn't be this soon. It had only been a week since she had woken up, and in turn a week and a half since she had been carrying Maura down the alleyway, both of them covered in blood, Maura almost dead…

A sharp knock on the door startled Jane and she sat up abruptly, breathing hard. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, trying to push the harsh memory out of her mind.

"Come in." She called. The door opened and Frankie appeared.

"Hey. Ma sent me to tell you, with the doctor's permission of course, that if you're up to it, a few of us have gathered in Maura's room to watch tonight's Red Sox game. We were going to come in here but you're text to Ma said Maura's room."

Jane rubbed a face over her hand and checked the clock on the wall. Was it really that late already? She must have fallen asleep without realising it. Noticing that Frankie was waiting for a response, she swung her legs over the side of the bed.

"Thanks Frankie. I'll be there in a minute." Jane looked up, flashing him a smile. Frankie walked the rest of the way in and the closed the door behind him, then sat up on the bed next to Jane. He studied her face with concern.

"Hey Janie, you doing alright?" He asked.

"Yeah I'm fine, just tired from today. Two therapies straight, in a row. Kind of tires one out." Jane glanced at him and knew that he wasn't buying it. He placed a hand over both of Jane's, stopping her from rubbing her scars, which she hadn't even noticed she was doing. Jane blushed and looked down at her feet.

"It's ok Jane. He's gone. For good this time." Frankie paused and looked away, trying to figure out what to say next. "If you need to talk, I'm here." Jane looked up and smiled at him, squeezing the hand that was covering hers.

"Thanks Frankie." After a slight pause, "Now we don't have a Red Sox game to watch? They're second on the table and to come first they need to smash this game. I don't want to miss a second of it." Frankie smiled and stood up, helping his sister to her feet.

"I don't know, I think the Yankees might beat the socks off of them." Jane groaned and punched him on the shoulder as they walked out.

"That's one of the worst, and oldest jokes of all time. And just for the record, the Yankees are nowhere near as good as the Red Sox. You say anything else and you're buying my drinks at the Dirty Robber for the next six months." Frankie's mouth quirked up in a smile.

"You want to bet? Ok then. If the Red Sox win, I'll buy your drinks at the Dirty Robber for the next two months. If the Yankees win, you have to buy me two cases of beer and drag me along to _all_ of your crime scenes for two months, from the time you get cleared to back to duty. Deal?" Frankie stopped outside of Maura's room and stuck out his hand. Jane rolled her eyes but gripped his hand in a firm handshake.

"Deal."

Twenty minutes later and Jane was sitting on the bed next to Maura with Angela, Constance, Korsak, Frost, Frankie and Tommy sitting on various chairs around them, all with their eyes glued to the TV on the wall opposite the bed. So far Jane and Maura hadn't told anyone or made any move to suggest they were together; it was kind of a silent mutual agreement, where they would know when the time was right.

"Oh come on! FOUL!" Jane shouted over a mouthful ravioli. With the doctor's say so Angela had brought Jane some plain ravioli for dinner as a treat, while they were all there. Maura still wasn't allowed anything to eat other than what the hospital gave her though, much to her disappointment. She missed Angela's cooking.

"Jane. It's a TV. They can't hear you. And you shouldn't speak with your mouthful, nor should you be eating so quickly considering you only just got your appetite back three days ago." Jane rolled her eyes at Maura and swallowed the food in her mouth.

"You bounce back quickly, don't you?" Jane said and suppressed a smile as Maura death stared her. "I'm sorry. I'm only joking." Jane threw an arm around Maura's shoulders and brought her close, placing a gentle kiss on her forehead. Angela quirked an eyebrow and glanced at Frankie, who shrugged, equally confused. Frankie caught Jane's eye, whose expression said _not now. Soon._ Frankie wiggled his eyebrows at her and Jane glared at him until he had the decency to look away, albeit with a smirk on his face.

"Hey Ma, is there any more pasta?" Jane asked hopefully as commercials came on.

"Sorry hon. I only made enough for one helping each." Angela replied, gesturing to the room. Jane's face fell slightly.

"You know Jane, if you're still hungry you can always ask for your hospital dinner." Maura teased and she scooped some jelly into her mouth. Jane wrinkled her nose.

"No thank you. I never want to eat that stuff again." Maura laughed.

"I don't think you have a choice. You've still got another week, at least." Maura said. Jane groaned.

"Don't remind me."

"Speaking of which, who are you gonna stay with when you're released, since Maura won't be out for at least another two weeks?" Tommy asked. Then, seeing Maura's expression, added "Sorry." Maura waved a hand.

"It's ok. Not your fault." She replied. Jane sat in silence, thinking. Who was she going to stay with? Normally she would stay at Maura's to recover, but since Maura was going to be in the hospital longer than her this time…

"You can stay with me." Angela supplied after a moment's silence. Everyone stopped what they were doing at looked at her.

"What? I'm Jane's mother, I should be allowed to take care of my daughter when's hurt."

"You do anyway." Jane muttered.

"What was that?" Angela shot her a look. Jane sighed.

"Ma, it's not that I don't appreciate the offer, but, well…I just…" Jane struggled to find the right words to explain it to her mother, but eventually gave up and looked to Maura for help. Maura glanced between Jane and Angela, noticing the tension.

"If you don't want to stay with Angela, how about a compromise? Your mother can stay with you, at your apartment." Maura said. Jane sighed, but realising she had no other choice reluctantly agreed.

"Fine. But once Maura's out I'm going to stay with her. She'll need someone to stay with as well and there is not enough room in my apartment for the three of us." Jane gruffed. Maura put her mouth close to Jane's ear to whisper.

"Unless I sleep with you." Maura shot Jane a wink and Jane just opened and closed her mouth, blushing, for once completely speechless. Thankfully no one had noticed because the game had come back on, except for Constance and Angela, who smirked at each other. Mother's instinct. The game finished around nine and as the whistle blew for the end, Jane pointed a finger at Frankie.

"AHA! The Red Sox won! You are buying my drinks at the Dirty Robber now for the next two months!" Jane yelled triumphantly and everyone laughed at Frankie's crestfallen face. Korsak slapped him on the back.

"That's why you don't make a deal with BPD's finest." Korsak grinned as Frankie glared at him. Jane looked at Maura, a question on her face, and Maura nodded. It was time.

"Hey guys," Jane started, and everyone looked at them. "Um, Maura and I, we, well…" Jane blushed and looked at Maura for help, who only smiled at her encouragingly. Jane, instead of explaining it with words, held up their locked hands, thought _what the hell?_ and kissed Maura lightly on the lips. When she looked back up, feeling rather sheepish, stunned faces stared at them until Constance leapt up.

"Finally! I thought Angela and I were going to have to set up a surprise date for you two to make . it happen!" Maura's shock equalled Jane's at Constance's outburst, who until now hadn't said a thing, but then Frost burst out laughing. Frankie followed, then Tommy until they were all laughing hysterically. When the laughter died down Korsak flung a coin at Frost.

"You win." He said.

"Wait what?" Jane asked, who didn't miss what Korsak gave Frost. Korsak glanced at her, surprised. All of a sudden he looked sheepish and almost scared. As did Frost.

"They had a bet going on whether or not you two were going to get together before the end of the year. Frost obviously won." Frankie explained, grinning.

Maura managed to look even more shocked at that.

"How can you possibly justify that bet? There is no…" Maura started but Jane placed a hand on her shoulder.

"Don't bother Maura. They're just a couple of assholes who think betting on one's relationship with another person is funny." Jane said and gave them another glare.

"Just wait until I get out of here. I'll get revenge." Jane smirked at their scared faces.

"Jane, whatever you're thinking don't do it or I'll…"

"MA!" All three Rizzoli children shouted. Maura yawned, tired after the activity of night. Jane noticed and absently started stroking her hair. Constance noticed too and nudged Angela, who nodded.

"Ok guys! I think it's time to head home. These two need their rest for tomorrow. Come on." Everyone said their goodbyes and promised they would be back soon as Angela herded them out.

"Goodnight baby." Angela said, kissing Jane on the forehead. "Goodnight to you too Maura. Hope you feel better tomorrow."

"Night Ma."

"Goodnight Angela."

"Goodnight Maura, sweetie. I'll be back tomorrow. Get a good sleep." Constance said and hugged her daughter, said bye to Jane and then followed Angela out.

"I have to go to my own room to sleep Maura. I'm tired out as well. But I'll see you tomorrow, ok? If you have a nightmare text me or call for the nurse, and ask her to come get me. Ok?" Jane softly laid Maura on the pillows as she stood up. A mumbled 'ok' was all she got, as Maura was barely awake. Jane just made it to her room before collapsing on the bed, falling immediately into sleep, not noticing the waiting figure in the shadowy corner of the room.

* * *

 **A/N: So, I'm just curious, but if anyone is currently watching R &I on TV, what did you think of the most recent season 6 episodes? Let me know in a review or PM. No reason for me asking other than I'm honestly just curious :)**


	6. Chapter 6

**Hey guys, so here's another chapter, two days in a row! I guess you could call it an apology for the delays, and also I've had sudden inspiration to really push this story along, so yeah :) Hopefully I can get the next chapter up at least by next monday, but it's a busy week so I'll try me best :)**

 **Thanks so much for the reviews, follows and favourites! My opinion on season 6? Eh. But I still watch it, because I still crave new episodes! (Have watched the other seasons about a hundred times :P )  
In response to karenpinnell52: I live in Australia and they've only JUST started airing season 5 here on TV, so I watch it all online. The waiting sucks, doesn't it? :p **

**So onto the next chapter! Read, enjoy and please review :)**

 **Chapter 6:**

 _A lone figure stands there, waiting, watching. At first Maura doesn't see: she is too busy interacting with her friends and family, too busy hiding the pain and the sleepiness. As Jane says goodnight she lets herself drift into slumber, welcoming the peacefulness. But it is anything but peaceful. As she starts to dream, she dreams of the figure. A tall guy in an orange jumpsuit, with short grey hair and scarring on the right side of his face. He lumbers over to her and grabs her arms, forcing her against the wall. She starts to scream as he pulls out a scalpel, but before he makes his mark he gestures to the floor behind him. Her face goes a sickly pale, her breathing starts coming in short breaths, her blood is pounding in her ears as she sees Jane Rizzoli motionless, arms and legs splayed out on the floor, a pool of blood around her. Her brain jumps to a conclusion and she does nothing to stop it, only screams Jane's name as Hoyt laughs and starts the process on her._

Maura woke up in a sweat, breathing hard. _It was only a nightmare,_ she thinks, and repeats it to herself as she presses the nurse call button. Maura buries her head in her hands, focusing on controlling her breathing. For the first time she understands the absolute true horror of what Jane went through the first time she encountered Hoyt. Maura looked up but almost leaped out of bed at the person sitting on the chair next to her. Breathing deeply she closed her eyes for a moment, but when she opened them they were still there. She reached over to the side table, wincing as she did so, and turned on the lamp that she had asked for. When she looked back over she sighed in relief. Hope; it was Hope that was sitting by her. Maura looked up as the door opened and the nurse came quietly in.

"You pressed the button. Is everything ok?" The nurse asked. Maura nodded.

"Yes it is. Sorry, I had a nightmare when I woke up and instantly panicked, pressing the call button. But I'm fine now." Maura tried to give a reassuring smile, which she knew the nurse didn't buy. Even so, the nurse nodded and went to leave but something stopped her. She turned back around and stood awkwardly at the end of Maura's bed, apparently trying to say something.

"You know, Miss Isles…"

"Dr Isles please, or Maura." The nurse nodded, a bit flustered.

"Dr Isles…I'm a big fan of your work. I've a few of your articles and I often keep up to date with your latest cases in the newspaper. But I never thought, actually none of us did here at the hospital that you would end up a victim of a serial killer." The nurse paused, watching Maura take in what she was saying. When it was apparent that the nurse wasn't going to say more, Maura sighed and took a moment to think.

"Neither did I." She said softly.

"Well, if there's anything else you need, don't hesitate to call us again." The nurse said, and left. Maura took a deep, shuddering breath and realised that she was crying. It was too much. She had been taken hostage not only for Hoyt's amusement, but also as bait for Jane. Maura buried her head in her hands again, letting the tears flow freely, momentarily forgetting Hope's presence. Even if Hoyt was dead, how could that possibly justify what she had been through? How could it ever be justified what Hoyt had done to her? He had beat her, tortured her, forced her to plead and beg for her life, yet still he didn't stop, even when Jane screamed at him over and over again. _Jane_. Jane, who was her world and always had been. Jane, who she loved so much but who also scared her to bits sometimes. Jane, who was so protective of the people she loved. But if Maura was totally, brutally honest with herself, it was Jane who put her in that situation. Maura's eyes shot open and she stared at the wall in disbelief. How could she ever think that about her best friend, and now her lover? How could Jane have known that Hoyt was still alive, how could Jane have known what that case would lead to when she was called in for the crime scene? There was no possible way that Jane could have known what would happen, to the both of them. Maura wiped the last of the tears away with the back of her hand, switched off the lamp and settled back into the pillows to try and get some sleep. As she drifted off she didn't notice that Hope was awake and had been the whole time, silently watching Maura as she battled her emotions.

* * *

Jane woke up early, having had a restless night's sleep. She glanced at the clock and noticed it was just on six o'clock. She would have been woken in an hour anyway. Carefully she lifted her top and inspected the bandaging over the wound. Today or tomorrow, depending on how her therapy went they were going to remove the stitches. Jane shuddered and lowered the top. Not for the first time she inspected the scars on her hands. Really noticed them; the way the tissue had formed an ugly lump, the prominent scarring still on her hand. Reminders of the dangers of her job and of how lucky the citizens were to not have to encounter what she does. Granted, it was a choice what she did, but she loved it. For whatever crazy reason she loved chasing down perps and getting shot at.

Jane stretched out her arms but winced as she went too far. Then she noticed the curtains over the windows. The way they fell. There was something odd about them…she stifled a scream as the curtains moved aside and a man stepped out. No, not just a man. Her…

"Daddy?" Jane asked, shocked. Frank Sr. put a finger on his lips for her to be quiet. He walked over to the bed and sat down on the edge.

"Janie, I needed to talk to you but I couldn't let your brothers or Angela see me." Frank Sr. said. He put a hand to silence Jane, who had a million thoughts and questions running through her mind. "Please just listen. The next case you are likely to get is going to be a tough, and possibly a more dangerous case than this one. I need you to be careful. But I also need your help and maybe the whole thing can be prevented." He sighed and looked towards the curtains. "Janie, I'm in trouble and you're the only one who can help me. Please," He looked to Jane with a forlorn look and Jane gulped. Why was he turning up now, after weeks, months even? Where was he when they all needed him most? Why did he disappear again after his cancer was cured? He only ever came back for something, not to just see them, see if they were ok, if they were still alive.

"Daddy, I don't know…I mean first we don't see or hear from you in ages, you leave Ma to sort out _your_ debts. You disappear again when your cancer is miraculously cured and now you've come back, but again not for us, but for _you!_ Why should I help you when you clearly don't care about us, about Ma? I almost got killed by a serial killer, again, but this time my best friend…no, my _girlfriend_ was involved and got injured worse than I am, heck she would have died if we were found even a second later!" Jane paused for breath and grasped her side as she heaved, realising that she was crying. Frank Sr. didn't say anything, he just sat there and stared at the floor, sensing she had more to say. Eventually Jane caught her breath and her side stopped hurting enough to talk. She glared at her dad until he caught her eye and held it.

"So give me one good fucking reason why I should listen to you and help you?" Frank Sr. studied Jane's face, took in the fury and anger in her eyes.

"I'm sorry." He said quietly. "I didn't mean to hurt your mum, your brothers or you. I had to leave, for your safety. I can't say anything more unless you agree to help me and until we can go somewhere more private to talk." He paused, gauging his next words carefully. Jane sat staring at him, stunned. She had so many things she wanted to ask, wanted to say to this man who had once been a loving and dedicated father and husband. But she was also eager to hear what he wanted to say, so Jane remained quiet. He turned to face her fully and grasped one of her hands tightly. Jane didn't pull back.

"Janie, what I'm involved in…it could affect both you and Maura, soon, if I don't find a way out. I know this is the worst time for you, and I hate seeing you hurt at you, but it would be even worse for me if my stupidity once again hurt you and our family." Frank Sr. finished, and watched Jane's face as she thought.

 _How can I trust him? How do I know he's not lying?_ Jane studied Frank's face. _No, he isn't lying. I don't have to be Maura to figure that out. But then what could he be involved in that was so dangerous? Unless…no. Her father wouldn't get involved in that, would he? Surely he's not that stupid._ Jane took a deep breath and sighed, removing her hand from her father's grip and running it through her wild, tangled curls.

"Dad, I don't…I don't know. I want to help you, I do, but if what you're involved in is as dangerous as you say, then what I would be putting myself through, as well as Maura and Ma and the rest of them? As it is I'm in the hospital because of a maniacal serial killer who tried to kill me in the past, and now you want me to throw myself into another situation that is potentially just as dangerous?" Jane closed her eyes, not wanting to meet her father's eyes. "I'm not normally one for this sort of caution, and I truly do want to help you, but I can't. Not until I'm out of the hospital, at least." She opened her eyes and saw the crushing disappointment on Frank's face. She lightly touched his arm with her hand, but he wouldn't look at her.

"If you change your mind, use this to contact me." He said, and tossed her a burner phone as he stood up to leave. "I really am sorry, Janie." He said, then left, closing the door quietly behind him. Jane leaned back and let out a shuddering breath, feeling the warm trickle of tears down her cheeks. She turned the phone he gave her over in her hands as she thought. But there was only one thought that she kept thinking. Was her father sorry for what he'd done to them in the past, or sorry for what was going to happen? His face as he left was burned into her mind, the despair and sorrow that he showed was heartbreaking. Jane curled her fists onto her chest, clenching the phone tightly and curled up in a ball, ignoring the painful pull of the stitches. The nurse found her like that an hour later when she came in to wake Jane, curled up in a ball, body heaving with silent sobs as the last few weeks and everything that had happened caught up with her.


	7. Chapter 7

**Hey guys! So once again, I fell back on my promise. And for that I am sorry. I really am. No matter how much I rewrote this chapter, I just wasn't happy with it. Plus, I was kind of stuck as to how to proceed. But I finally figured it out, and now I've got my mojo back and am working furiously on this story to get it moving! I'm sorry if things are still a bit slow, they will speed up soon. Just please stick with me! And for all of you who are sticking with this story, despite the time it's taking to write it, thank you so much! And thank you to all those who have reviewed too! It really means a lot!**

 **Also, if I don't respond to your review please don't think that I don't read them, or take them on board, because I do.**

 **Anyway, that's the boring stuff. Now on to the story! I hope you like this update, and please read and review! Thanks :)**

 **Chapter 7:**

"Maur, I don't…no I'm fine. Maur you know I really want to see you, but I can't. I have to see this damn psychologist after this morning. Maur I don't need a lecture. They're calling me in. I'll talk to you later." Jane sighed as she ended the call. The nurse had called James after her breakdown that morning and as a result, had brought her appointment with the psychologist forward. Jane had been a mess. She was hysterical when the nurse had gotten the doctor.

 _"Jane. Jane, it's ok. You're fine and you're safe." James Caldwell said, attempting to reassure his patient._

 _"No I'm not safe…I'm not ok…he came…and then he said that…that…and then he gave me this…and after Ho…after you know who…I don't know…I can't…" Jane stuttered. She knew she wasn't making sense and she knew that she was acting hysterical, but she couldn't help it. Everything Jane had already been through, and somehow the universe always managed to throw a spanner in the works, just when she thought things might finally be ok. Jane was starting to realise that nothing might ever be ok, that things might never end the way she wants them to. And that realisation hurt so badly that she could almost feel it physically. She felt tears trailing down her cheeks again and buried her head in her arms, which were atop her knees. James looked at the nurse and nodded to her._

 _"Call Angela and Frank Rizzoli. She needs family right now." James instructed. The nurse nodded and hurried out of the room. James placed a hand on the edge of her knee._

 _"Jane, you're going to be fine. Whatever happened can be resolved. I promise you that." He said. Jane looked up and met James' eyes._

 _"Can I ask you a question?" Jane asked. James nodded._

 _"Have you ever not been able to save someone in ER or ICU?" Jane asked, almost hesitantly. She watched as the doctor could suddenly no longer meet her eyes. He removed his hand from her knee. Jane could tell that she had struck a nerve. Whoever he had not been able to save had obviously been important._

 _"Yes." He answered._

 _"More than one person?" Jane queried. James took a deep breath and tried to keep his tears at bay._

 _"Yes." This time, James answered in a whisper. Jane didn't ask anything more, but she didn't have to. James saw the question on her face and sighed again._

 _"Yes, one of them was someone close to me. It was my brother's wife; my sister in law. 3 years ago. It was my fault. She was shot in a drive by shooting. I tried to save her, but…" James trailed off, not needing to finish. Jane looked out the window. It had started to rain lightly._

 _"How do you live with knowing that someone close to you got severely injured, and that it was your fault, despite what everyone else says?" Jane asked. More tears were trailing down her cheeks, mirroring the rain outside. James studied her._

 _"You're talking about Maura?" He asked. Jane nodded. James took her hand in his, forcing her to meet his eyes._

 _"Jane, for once others are right. It was not your fault. You had no knowledge that a serial killer from your past would come back. You couldn't have known that he was going to take Maura, or when he was going to take her, or where. And the difference between my story and yours is that you saved her; you somehow managed to get the both of you, both inured I might add, out of that building and where your colleagues could find you. That is not something to take lightly." James said and squeezed her hand. Jane smiled weakly and squeezed back. She was still very shaken by her father's visit, but James had reassured her somewhat. Even managed to calm her down, which is not an easy feat. For anyone._

 _"Thankyou." Jane whispered. James smiled. At that moment the door was burst open and her mother and Frankie rushed in. James quickly let go of her hand and walked out of the room, giving them some privacy. He was smiling when he got back to his office. He made the call to the psychologist to reschedule for that morning. James normally didn't get too close to his patients; it was easier that way when they were discharged. But somehow Jane had managed to crack open his barriers and had gotten him to talk about something he hadn't talked about in 3 years. Realising his phone was ringing, he put those thoughts aside and got back to work._

As Jane took a seat on the black leather couch in the psychologist's office, she smiled at the memory of that morning. She was waiting for maybe ten minutes before the psychologist walked in, taking a seat behind the wooden desk. She pulled out a file, then came back around the desk to sit in an office chair facing the couch.

"Good morning Jane, my name is Kelsie Hunton and as you already know, I am going to be your psychologist." Kelsie held out a hand to Jane. After realising that Jane wasn't going to shake it, she drew it back awkwardly.

"I guess you don't like psychologists then, huh?" Kelsie asked, not looking up from the file.

"You guessed right." Jane said, not attempting to hide her annoyance. Kelsie smiled slightly. Jane was not the first patient she had dealt with who had an aversion to the profession. Both women were silent for a moment longer while Kelsie finished reading Jane's file. After a few minutes she closed the file and looked up at Jane.

"So, you have had quite the challenges during your job as a detective, huh?" Kelsie asked.

"Yeah, what gave you that idea?" Jane retorted sarcastically.

"Tell me about this morning." Kelsie said. Jane sat there silently. After a minute Kelsie sighed.

"Jane, I am not your enemy. I know you are probably mistrusting of me, for several reasons, but you need to at least try to trust me. I promise you that anything you say is strictly confidential; I will not tell anyone, not even Dr Caldwell, unless I think that it pertains to your physical health and recovery. Even then, I will probably ask your permission to tell the Dr. Ok?" Kelsie said. Jane nodded.

"Ok. I guess." She replied. Kelsie smiled.

"Ok then. Well, how about we start from the beginning. Why don't you tell me everything that has happened, from the time you got called to the first crime scene for your latest case?" Kelsie suggested. Jane thought for a moment. She took a deep breath. Deciding to take a leap of faith and trust this woman, Jane started to talk.

"Before we got called to the first crime scene, Maura, the chief medical examiner and my best friend, who is now my girlfriend, came to my apartment…"

 ** _20 minutes earlier (Maura's POV)_**

Maura sighed as the call to Jane was ended. She was worried about Jane. They hadn't had a chance to properly talk about Jane's breakdown that morning and Maura was worried about it. She knew that Jane wouldn't easily open up about it, even with her, but Maura would try. She had to. Plus Maura knew that there was something else bothering Jane, something that she was afraid to talk about it. They hadn't talked much on the phone; there hadn't been time. But from Jane's tone of voice, something had rattled her last night that shook her to the core and Maura wanted to know what it was, if only to try and help Jane. Maura sighed and closed her eyes.

" _Aghhh!" Maura screamed and bolted upright. Breathing heavily, she scanned the room for any unwanted visitors and breathed a sigh of relief when she found none. A nightmare. Just another nightmare. Leaning back against the pillows, Maura grabbed her phone from the nightstand. Turning it on, she checked to see if Jane had texted or called and was disappointed when she found that Jane hadn't. She was just about to call Jane herself when a movement near the window caught her attention. Maura squinted, trying to decide if she was imagining things or not. Nothing happened for a moment and Maura sighed, turning her attention back to her phone. But as Maura dialled Jane's number, she saw someone at the window out of the corner of her eye. She turned her head until her eyes were scanning the window intensely. Phone now forgotten, Maura sat up, her heart pounding in her chest. At first, nothing happened. Then the window shattered, and Maura screamed. She made to press the 'call' button for the nurse, but no sooner had she moved than a figure was pinning her to the bed, holding a knife to her throat. Maura choked back a cry as her gaze fell upon the assailant._

 _"Hello, Maura. We've got some unfinished business to attend to, don't we?" Hoyt said, and grinned that creepy smile as he plunged the knife into the side of her neck._

 _"Aghhhh!"_

"Aghhhhh!" Maura screamed as she abruptly woke. Her heart was beating wildly and she could feel the wet trail of tears on her cheeks. She patted herself down to assure herself that she was awake and in reality. She stared at the window for several minutes before accepting that no one was going to burst through. She picked up her phone from the nightstand, automatically bringing up Jane's number, but held off calling. She wanted, needed Jane with her, but she was still in with the psychologist. The nightmare had seemed so real and Maura couldn't help but wonder if it was real, even though she knew that she was being irrational. _Who can I call?_ Maura asked herself. She was torn between Angela and Constance; she so desperately wanted to call Angela, but then again she didn't want her own mother to feel like she wasn't wanted. Maura buried her head in her hands and sobbed. Not for the first time, she wished that science could help her sort out her emotions and her irrational fears. _They are not irrational. You just went through a traumatising experience; it's normal to feel this way,_ Maura told herself, but it didn't do much good. Even though it had only been five days, she was sick of the hospital already. Sick of being scared and sick of being dependent on everyone. Maura just wanted to go home, back to life. She wanted to go back to a daily routine, go back to work and most of all, she wanted everyone to stop fussing over her, like she was some delicate porcelain that would shatter at the slightest bump. She knew that they all had good intentions, and knew that it would be at least another two weeks until she was discharged. Maura sighed and wiped her eyes dry on her nightgown, for once not caring about the small formality of tissues. At least she was starting her physical therapy that afternoon. Despite it being a Saturday, the clinics within the hospital were still fully operational. The only day they were closed was Sundays. Her doctor wanted her to have an assessment of her physical abilities done today, so they could set up a routine for her during the week. Maura had started to walk around the room by herself when she needed to go to the bathroom, but just sitting in bed all day with nothing to do was driving her mad. She reached over to the nightstand and opened the draw, pulling out a notebook and a pen. She had started a journal to write in when there was no around to talk to. No one knew, not even Jane. It was something that Maura wanted to keep to herself, to write down all her thoughts and feelings, even the ones she didn't tell anyone about. Maura opened to a new page, and began to write.


	8. Chapter 8

**Hey guys! Thanks for the reviews, and thanks for sticking with this story! As D3nsei suggested, I've given Jane and Maura a bit of time to themselves. In hindsight it's not that much, but it works with the story line I've got planned out. Also I'm sorry if this chapter seems a little rushed; I did my best with it, without trying to rush it.**

 **So please read, enjoy and review! :)**

 **Chapter 8:**

 ** _6 days later_**

Frank Sr. paced in his cheap hotel room, worried. It was almost a full week since he had talked to Jane and he desperately needed her help, but he knew that he had lost her trust. He knew that they all resented them for tearing their family part. But what could he do? His choices had been, and still were, limited. His only choices when he left Angela was to leave her, or stay and put his wife and his children in danger. At least if he moved away, then _they_ couldn't harm Angela, Jane, Frankie or Tommy. Or anyone close to them. At least that was what he'd thought. Frank stopped pacing and sighed, running a hand through his hair. He really didn't want to get Jane involved; it was the last thing that he had ever wanted. While Frankie, his son, was also a cop and detective, he wasn't as experienced as Jane, nor did he have the rapporteur that she did. But she was a good kid, and a good woman and it broke Frank's heart to have to ask her to help him.

He sat on the edge of the bed (one of the few pieces of furniture in the room) and thought back to the conversation he had had with Jane.

 _"Please just listen. The next case you are likely to get is going to be a tough, and possibly a more dangerous case than this one. I need you to be careful. But I also need your help and maybe the whole thing can be prevented." He sighed and looked towards the curtains. "Janie, I'm in trouble and you're the only one who can help me. Please,"_

A tear trickled down his cheek as he remembered her response. Jane had given to him what he deserved, even though Frank knew that was only a taste of the real anger she felt for him.

 _Why should I help you when you clearly don't care about us, about Ma? I almost got killed by a serial killer, again, but this time my best friend…no, my_ girlfriend _was involved and got injured worse than I am, heck she would have died if we were found even a second later!"_

A sharp knock on the door brought Frank out of his reverie. He got up and walked to the door. There was no eye hole, so he quietly picked up his gun off the table. Opening the door an inch, he peeped through, trying to see who was there. He was surprised to find no one waiting; instead, an envelope with his name on it was left on the carpet. He picked it up then walked back inside, locking the door as he closed it. Ripping the envelope open, he read the short note that it contained. His face went pale and he sat down.

 **TWO WEEKS**

And that was why, if Jane didn't call him within the next three days, then he really had only one option left if he didn't want his family or the people close to them involved or harmed.

 ** _At the hospital_**

Jane bounced nervously on the edge of the bed. She was being discharged today and couldn't wait to go home, even if it meant that her mother would be living with her until Maura was released, which would hopefully be by the end of next week. It was a bright, sunny Friday morning and Jane was excited. She was just waiting for her mother and Dr James to finalise the paperwork and her therapy schedule, then she would be on her way to freedom. In a manner of speaking. She still had to come back four times a week; three days for physical therapy (still), and one day for her two hour psychologist session, which she would be having for at least the next month. Jane groaned at the thought. Kelsie Hunton was a nice enough person, but it was hard for Jane to open up to people. Her first session with the psychologist six days ago had been emotional, to say the least. Kelsie didn't say one word throughout her recount of the events leading up to her and Maura being kidnapped. When Jane had finished, she was surprised to find that she was crying. Kelsie, however, didn't seem surprised at all by it. Instead she offered Jane a tissue, then just continued on with her analysis like nothing had happened. For that, Jane was grateful. Then Kelsie started talking about her breakdown. Jane answered the questions rather vaguely, on purpose, and when time was up Jane rushed out of there as quickly as possible. Jane didn't know what Kelsie wrote in the report to Dr James, but whatever it was she wasn't sure she wanted to find out.

The door opened and Angela walked in, followed by James. Jane practically leaped off the bed and grabbed her duffel bag, which contained the personal belongings that Jane had accumulated throughout her stay.

"You ready to go?" Jane asked Angela. Angela smiled, happy to see her daughter so excited.

"Yes Jane. We can go now." Angela replied. Jane was already half out the door. There was only one stop she had to make before making her way to the car park.

Having told Angela to meet her at the front entrance of the hospital in a few minutes, Jane opened the door to Maura's room and stepped in, closing it behind her. She could hear the water running in the bathroom and figured that Maura was in the shower. Jane sat on the edge of the bed to wait, her hands clasped in her lap. The past few days had been tough. Jane had finally told Maura about Frank Sr.'s visit. Originally she wasn't going to tell anyone, but the burden had gotten the better of her and she had to tell somebody. And Maura was the only one she trusted enough to tell. Maura's reaction had been surprising, to say the least. She had gotten angry, calling him names that Jane had never heard Maura use. Jane didn't say anything, just let her vent her thoughts. Once Maura had calmed down they talked some more about it. To sum it up, Maura basically said that Jane shouldn't call him. At least not straight away. Then Maura told Jane about her nightmares. Jane sighed, thinking. It was too much and Jane was confused and conflicted about it all. The only thing that she was sure of was Maura. Jane smiled at that. The door to the bathroom opened and Jane started, surprised.

"Hey." She said. Maura smiled at her and sat down next to her, dressed in fresh tracksuit pants and a plain t-shirt in preparation for the day's therapy. _Totally un-Maura like_ , Jane thought.

"Hey." Maura said in return. "So. You're going home." Maura said, looking down at her hands.

"Yeah. But I still have to come back four days a week, and I'll visit you every day of the week. If you want." Jane offered. For a moment there was silence. Then Maura sighed.

"I would like that. Very much. But would it be too much for us?" Maura asked. Jane sat, thinking. She knew what Maura meant. More often than not, couples who spend too much time together early in their relationship find that they (quickly) end up needing time apart, because they have spent too much time together, too soon.

"I suppose you're right. How about, then, the days that I'm in for physical therapy I come and visit you, for an hour or two." Jane compromised. Maura nodded.

"That sounds good." She replied. Another silence. Their relationship had become fragile over the past week since Maura had also started psychological, as well as physical, therapy. They both had the same psychologist, Kelsie, and they knew that they had a lot to talk about, even though neither wanted to broach the subject just yet. But the tension that had formed between Jane and Maura as a result was evident.

"I'm going to miss you Maur." Jane said and took one of Maura's hands in her own. Even though it wasn't going to be that long since Maura was most likely going to be discharged by the end of next week, Jane still couldn't help but feel guilty that she was leaving Maura here. Alone. She leaned over and kissed Maura, passionately, slowly, drawing it out. Maura removed her hand from Jane's and placed her hands behind Jane's head, leaning in to the kiss. Eventually they stopped for breath and Jane leaned her forehead on Maura's.

"We still have to talk." Jane said softly, quietly.

"I know we do. But I think we both need time to gather our thoughts and feelings and we need to have clear heads when we do talk. It's going to be a few days before we see each other next. If we're both up to it, why don't we talk then?" Maura asked. Jane knew that Maura was right. They both needed the time apart to sort themselves out without worrying too much about the other.

"Ok. I'll see you in a few days then?"

"I guess you will." Maura replied. Jane pulled back from Maura and stood up. Standing in the doorway, she looked back at Maura and smiled at her before walking out, closing the door behind her.

Hours later and Maura was sitting in bed with the TV on and the latest science journal in hand. It had been a tough and exhausting day of therapy and Maura, for once, was glad that she didn't have to do anything for the rest of the day but relax. It was only four pm, but for that, Maura was grateful. She had started physical therapy at eleven am, then had a short lunch break before going off to see the psychologist, which had been both emotionally and mentally draining.

A soft knock on the door surprised Maura and the door opened.

"Hi." Said Hope. Maura was shocked at first, but quickly recovered.

"Hey." Maura said. She closed her magazine and sat up a bit straighter. With a wave of her hand, she invited Hope in, who had still been standing in the doorway.

"How's Caitlin?" Maura asked as Hope sat down.

"She's doing really well." Hope replied. Maura smiled.

"How are you feeling?" Hope asked her.

"I've been better." Maura sighed. "But I'm recovering quickly. Hopefully, I'll be out in a week." Hope nodded and smiled at her, but didn't say anything. Maura was getting uncomfortable in the stretched silence and she had the feeling that Hope had something to say to her. Maura decided to break the tension.

"Did you come here for something?" Maura asked, looking Hope right in the eye. Her tone wasn't harsh, but it still held some malice to it. Hope briefly caught her eye before looking away.

"I…I wanted to apologise to you. For the way I treated you when you donated your kidney to Caitlin. I never properly thanked you for it."

"Thank you, Hope. For apologising. It means a lot. And I was happy to give my kidney to Caitlin; she's a good kid." Maura said. Hope smiled at her, a real genuine smile. Maura smiled back.

"I brought you something as well." Hope said, and dug through her bag. Pulling it out, she handed it to Maura. It was the latest science journal that Maura had just been reading, but the thought was nice all the same. Not wanting to be rude, she smiled and studied the cover, acting as if she hadn't already read it.

"Thank you, Hope. This is really sweet." She said. Hope nodded and stood up, sensing that it was time for her to leave.

"It's only something small, but I thought you would appreciate it." Hope said. Maura smiled again.

"Well, have a good weekend Maura. Is it ok if I come back to visit sometime next week? I'll call to let you know I'm coming." Hope asked. Maura nodded.

"Of course it is." Maura answered. Not knowing what else to say, she watched as Hope walked out then sighed. _Well that was awkward_. Maura was confused by Hope's visit. It had been nice for her to visit, yet Maura had the feeling that something was wrong. Something had just seemed off about Hope. Or was she just being paranoid? Whatever it was, Maura didn't want to think about it just now. She was tired and drained. So instead Maura placed the magazine on top of her other one on the nightstand and settled in for a night of TV.


	9. Chapter 9

**Hey everyone! Thanks for the reviews, and sorry (once again) for the very long delay! I know I'm not making following this story line very easy to keep up with, but I hope you all are still with me! So here is chapter 9, it is a short chapter and from Maura's POV only. I hope you enjoy it, and please please leave a review! I am writing mainly for you guys, so tell me what you think, good or bad. Don't be afraid, I don't bite!**

 **So yeah, onto the chapter! :)**

 **Chapter 9:**

 _Darkness surrounds her. She can't hear or see anything. She can feel herself moving, slowly putting one foot in front of the other cautiously but she barely registers it. Her breathing is loud and laboured with fear in the heavy silence. She calls out into the black but no sounds reach back to her. Her arms move out in front of her body. She walks a few more feet before her ears prick up at a slight noise. She stops abruptly, trying to control her breathing. At first she hears nothing. But there! She hears it again and starts to walk, picking up her pace with each step until she is sprinting towards the sound. The air around her is still pitch black but she doesn't give it a thought, just trusts her mind to not let her slam into a wall. Suddenly she finds herself in a brightly lit room and she stumbles backwards a few steps, raising her hand to her eyes. She waits a minute or so for her eyes to adjust to the new light. Still squinting but able to see, she slowly moves into the room. There isn't much to see; bare concrete walls and a concrete floor, a small wooden desk with a chair in the corner and a single lightbulb hanging from the ceiling. She realises now that the light only seemed to be bright, but is in actuality quite dim. She walks further into the room until she is standing at the centre. She looks up at the ceiling, up at the lightbulb before examining her surroundings some more. There is nothing of interest here, so where did the sound come from? She asks herself. It is then that she hears a quiet whimper somewhere behind her, to the right. She turns in that direction and gasps._

 _"I'm sorry. I am so, so sorry. Oh god, Jane. Why..?"_

Maura opened her eyes and sat up gasping, tears running down her face. Again. She placed a hand on her chest and breathed deeply, trying to calm her heartbeat. She knew that it had been only a nightmare, but that image of Jane in the corner, so scared and beat up shook Maura to the core. It was going to be a while before she forgot this one. She threw back the covers and went into the bathroom to splash water on her face. She gazed at her reflection in the mirror. God, she looked awful. There were dark circles under her eyes that were all too visible without the usual makeup that she wore. Her eyes lacked some of the spark that they had before and her expression was not one of happiness or joy. With a sigh she wiped her face down with the hand towel and walked back into her room. She sat on the edge of the bed, her elbows resting on her knees, wondering what she could possibly do that would keep her occupied. It was only nine am on a Saturday morning; her therapy today didn't start until 12. She could go for a walk around the hospital lawn that was reserved for patients, but she didn't much like the idea of having to talk to other patients. They would most likely ask her things like, _what are you in for?_ Or, if they watched the news or read the local newspaper, _are you the medical examiner that was attacked by that serial killer?_ No, Maura decided, she didn't want to go for a walk. Instead, she decided to go down to the hospital newsagency to see if they had any new medical journals in. Maura liked to keep up to date with the latest in the science world; it helped to know that she wasn't missing out on too much and was her way of keeping in contact with the rest of the world. Angela had (very kindly) brought her some clean clothes from home when she had picked up Jane the day before. They were nothing fancy, just some plain t-shirts and trackies and a pair of jeans in case she ever felt like wandering around, like now. The hospital staff were fine with her wearing her own clothes outside of therapy, as long as she didn't wear each item more than once and she wore the hospital gown to bed at night (as per their strict policy). So Maura slipped on the jeans and a plain black t-shirt and walked out of her room, heading down the hall towards the elevators.

A few minutes later and Maura was browsing the magazine isle in the small newsagency. She'd had to sign a register at the reception as she passed it in the hall, so the staff knew where she was in case something happened. It was a little annoying, but Maura knew it was necessary so she did it without complaint. The newsagency didn't have all that much in the way of science; they only had the journal issue that Maura had bought the day before (and which Hope also gave her), and another one that wasn't as popular due to its reputation of often publishing inaccurate information with less than reliable sources. Finding nothing worth buying Maura walked out of the shop and, feeling dejected, she had nothing else to do but to go back up her room. Besides, she wanted to check if she had any texts from Jane, and her phone was in her room. As she signed off at the reception and made her way back to the elevators, Maura was suddenly grabbed by the arm and pulled into an empty room. She was about to scream for help but a hand came over her mouth, silencing her.

"Don't yell, ok? I need to talk with you." Recognising the voice with a feeling of uneasiness, Maura nodded slowly and the hand was withdrawn. She turned around to face her biological father.

"What are you doing here?" She snapped.

"I'm sorry. I know the last couple of weeks have been hard on you…"

"What do you know?" Maura interrupted him, "you have no idea what Jane and I have been through and you have no business being here right now! I have enough on my mind right now; I don't need you adding to it." Maura turned to leave but his hand on her arm stopped her.

"Please. What you say is true, but I needed to talk to you. It concerns Jane." Paddy said. Maura turned to meet his gaze with a weary yet fearful expression.

"What about Jane?" She asked. Paddy flinched at her defensive tone; she was not going to like what he was about to tell her.

"It's about her father, Frank Sr. He contacted me early this morning. Maura, he sounded very distressed. He wanted me to help him; he's in some deep shit. But I don't know if I can without putting you, Jane and your families in any more danger." Paddy said. Maura gazed at him with shock.

"Well do you know what he is involved in? Jane told me that the other night her father crept in and spoke to her about something similar, but he will only tell her what is going in if she agrees to help him. Which I don't think she has done yet." Maura explained. For the moment, her hatred and negativity towards Paddy Doyle had been set aside; all she cared about now was Jane's safety, especially now that she had been discharged from the hospital only yesterday and it seemed like danger was already lurking around the corner. Again. Will they ever get a break? _No,_ Maura decided. _We won't._

"Well if she doesn't agree to help him in the next two days, then…well, then he's asked me to help him. And I agreed." Paddy explained. He silently watched as Maura's expression turned from shocked to fearful to being furious.

"What?! Why? How could you?" Maura demanded. She had a million thoughts running through her mind, all of them unpleasant ones. What was going to happen if Doyle helped Frank Sr.? What could he possibly be involved in that he had to call one of the major crime bosses in Boston for help? Why did he have to involve Jane, and now herself?

"Maura, I agreed to do this to protect you, and Jane. He told me what he's done and what is about to go down, and it doesn't look pretty. I can see why he asked Jane for help," Maura opened her mouth to respond, but Doyle cut her off. "But I'm not going to tell what is happening. No one can know unless they absolutely have to. And it is staying that way. But I had to tell you. That's why I came here. I'm sorry, Maura." Doyle tried to leave but Maura blocked the door.

"Wait, no. That can't be it. You have to tell me what is going on! You owe me that much. And how did Frank Sr. even you get your number?" Maura asked. Doyle sighed, visibly depleted.

"Let's just say that he's an old contact. And no Maura, it breaks my heart but I can't tell you right now. I'm sorry. I have to go now; the nurses might be wondering where you've gone to. But I gave Jane a burner phone, use that if you need to contact me. Goodbye." Doyle said, then left. Maura didn't try to stop him this time. She stood there in a daze for a few minutes before realising that they might actually start looking for her soon. She walked out of the empty room and back up to her own one in a slight state of shock. What could Jane's father have done that would warrant Doyle getting involved? And what did he mean when he said that Frank Sr. was an 'old contact'? _I need to tell Jane about this,_ Maura thought. _Or do I? It would put so much more stress on her, and on us, if I tell her. But then she is also going to get mad if she finds out about this second hand, or worse, if an investigation pertaining to whatever her father is involved in occurs._ Having reached a decision by the time she got back to her room, Maura picked up her phone and dialled Jane's number. Maura held her breath, anticipating the conversation.

"Hey Maur!" Jane's voice came, from the other end of the phone. She sounded peaceful and happy, for once. In that instant Maura hated herself for what she had to tell her girlfriend, but she couldn't back out now.

"Hey, Jane…"


	10. Chapter 10

**Hey guys! I know, two updates in a row, what?! But I felt like writing, and also I feel that I owe it to all of you who continue to review and read this story. It is much appreciated, especially with the long delays in updates!**

 **So yeah, here is chapter 10, and please read, review and enjoy! :)**

 **Chapter 10:**

 ** _Two hours earlier:_**

Jane groaned as her alarm went off. She flung an arm out at her phone, accidentally knocking it off the bedside table. She grunted and threw out some curse words before building up the energy to lean over the bed and pick up her phone, wincing as she did so. She switched the alarm off then sighed. She was hoping for a sleep in this morning, but that wasn't going to happen now that she was awake. And it was only seven thirty.

"Great." Jane muttered. All the doubts and worries that had built up over the last few days slowly crept back into her mind. Jane forced herself out of bed and, not even bothering to prepare some clean clothes for the day, went straight into the shower. She turned it on full blast and had the temperature as high as she could stand it. Taking pleasure from the hot water and the steam that was surrounding her, Jane breathed deeply. She glanced out of the shower doors, thinking. Mostly about Maura. But about other things as well. Her father, for instance. What was possibly going on that he needed her help so bad? She had replayed the conversation she had had with him over and over again, but he had given nothing away as to what he was really up to. Jane did have one idea, however, but it was an insane idea. Something that even her father wouldn't dare get into. The impact that it would have on all of them was too great for even her father to consider it. Or would he? _It's possible if he's been involved in it for far longer than just the last few weeks. A year, or maybe even longer would be enough for things to escalate…_

"No! STOP!" Jane yelled, at no one but herself. She shook her head to clear the thoughts from her mind. No matter how much she hated her father, Jane knew that he could never do something like that. Never. As she finished washing her hair she closed her eyes and took a few deep breaths, breathing in the hot steam, trying to clear her head. As she opened her eyes something outside of the shower caught her eye. She squinted, rubbed some steam off the shower door with her hand and peeked through. Nothing. She sighed again, resting her head against the door.

SLAM!

Jane jumped back from the door as something, no _someone_ slammed into it. The figure started moving, sliding slowly over the glass. A scalpel became apparent in its hand as it slowly opened the shower door. Jane was too frightened to move; her eyes were wide with fear and she was hyperventilating, but she couldn't give a damn. She watched as the figure started to come into the shower itself; she gasped in horror when she realised who it was. Yet it wasn't. It was Hoyt, but he was horrendously disfigured. His face was even more scarred than usual and one eye was closed, like he couldn't open it properly. His white t-shirt was stained with dried, old blood, as were his pants and he limped as he walked towards her. He brandished the scalpel as he came nearer; less than a metre away now. Jane was too terrified to do anything, even cover herself; she just flashed back to that dark room, where she had been forced, by Hoyt himself, to watch her girlfriend be repeatedly tortured to the point of unconsciousness. He raised the scalpel and was about to strike when Jane screamed, grabbing her razor (the closest, sharpest object) and ran at him with it.

* * *

Angela was up early, since six am. No matter how hard she tried she hadn't been able to sleep in, it had been that way ever since she'd had kids. But she wouldn't change it for the world. She put some washing on early then started to clean up Jane's house, as quietly as she could. She put the TV on low for the morning news as she cleaned; dirty clothes in the basket, pans in the sink to be washed later, dishwasher filled and put on. Jane's work notes from the last time she was here piled neatly and set in the corner of the coffee table. After doing as much as she could, Angela made herself a cup of coffee and sat down on the couch, waiting for Jane to wake to make her breakfast. She checked the clock on the TV; it read seven am. _Not too bad, if I do say so myself_. Angela picked up the magazine that she had brought with her and started to read it. It was Oprah's latest magazine, full of the most recent celebrity gossip, recipes, Oprah's advice and more. She didn't care what her daughter thought of it, she enjoyed it, even if it was trash. _God, don't say that in front of Jane. You'll never live it down._ Angela checked the time again when she got halfway through the magazine; seven thirty. _Wow, that went quickly_ , she thought. She heard Jane's alarm go off in her room and got up to start making Jane breakfast. Ten minutes later, she was halfway through frying the bacon when she heard a scream and a crash from the bathroom. Startled and panicked, Angela threw down her spatula and raced to the bathroom. When she opened the door she saw Jane sitting on the shower tiles, a razor held up in front of her, butt naked. There were tears streaming down her face and the water was still running. Shocked at the sight in front of her, Angela tried to keep her expression calm. _She's having another panic attack. Play it cool, try to calm her down. Then get her into some fresh clothes._ Hesitantly she stepped towards the shower so that Jane could see her. Her daughter looked up at her with a dazed expression, not quite all there.

"Ma…don't…please…he…he's…" Jane rasped. Angela was close to crying herself; this was the worst she had ever seen Jane, excluding the first time Hoyt had hurt her, of course.

"Jane, baby…lower the razor, please. I'm coming in." Angela waited until Jane reluctantly put the razor down before stepping into the shower, not even caring that the water was running and she was still fully clothed. She knelt down before her daughter.

"Jane, honey…what happened?" She asked softly. Jane shook her head and burst into tears. Angela's heart broke again. _No mother should ever have to see her daughter like this,_ she thought. She placed a gentle hand on Jane's arm.

"Come on Jane. It's all going to be ok. Whatever happened, it wasn't real. You're safe honey. Come on." Jane shook her head at Angela's words.

"No, Ma, I'm not. I can't trust anyone, either." Jane rasped without looking up. Angela gulped. She took a deep breath.

"Do you trust me?" Angela asked. Jane nodded.

"Ok, then. I'm going to turn the water off, and then I'll help you out. Ok?" Angela asked. Another nod. Angela stood up slowly and switched off the water. Jane still hadn't moved from her position on the floor. Angela grabbed the clean towel that was on the bathroom bench and started to dry Jane's arms and legs. When she got to her face, Angela noticed that Jane was still hyperventilating. It was very subtle though.

"Jane, take some nice slow breaths for me, ok?" Angela watched as her daughter silently did as she was asked.

"That's it, good. Are you feeling any better?" Angela asked. Jane shook her head and raised her eyes to meet Angela's. Her expression was still slightly dazed, and she still had a fearful, troubled expression. Angela sat back on her heels, sensing that Jane was about to say something important. So she remained quiet, for once.

"Ma, he…I was in the shower…and he…he came in…and tried to attack me…but he looked awful, like more than usual. He was limping, he held up a…a…well, you know…" Jane was shaking now, her whole body racked with nerves. Angela, fighting tears herself, placed a comforting hand on Jane's shoulder. Jane reached up and squeezed it as she tried to tell her mother the rest of what she had seen.

"He was about to…to stab me…but I screamed and grabbed the razor…I ran at him with it…but then I slipped and fell…and he was gone…" Jane was crying now, sobbing, her whole body rocking back and forth. Angela wrapped the towel around her and pulled her into a hug, holding her until Jane calmed down. Neither knew how much time passed, but it was a while until Jane started to come to her senses; Angela didn't say a word, she just held her daughter, letting her cry uncontrollably, getting all her emotions out. Eventually Jane pulled back from her mother a bit and took some deep breaths, trying to calm down again. She smiled an unconvincing smile at Angela and dried her eyes with the towel, pulling it tighter against her.

"Am I going insane, Ma?" Jane asked, not able to meet her eyes.

"No, baby, you're not. After everything you've been through…with Maura, and everything else…it is completely normal for these things to happen. I'm here for you, Janie. We all are." Angela said. She squeezed Jane's hand, who squeezed back. "Do you want me to call your psychologist? Or doctor? Or Maura?" Angela offered. Jane shook her head.

"No, Ma. That's kind, but I'll be ok. I see my psychologist in a few days anyway, and my doctor before then. And Maura, well…I'll tell her in time. For now, can this just be between us? Please?" Jane pleaded. Angela nodded.

"Of course, sweetheart. But you know, Maura is your girlfriend. You should tell her about this. In fact I was going to go visit her this afternoon, if you wanted to come…"

"Ma!" Jane yelled and groaned. Angela stifled a laugh.

"Or not…that's ok, I'll tell her you say hi anyway." Angela replied. Jane death stared her. Angela raised her hands in surrender.

"Come on, I think you should get up and get dressed. I make you some coffee and we'll talk some more in a few minutes. Let me help you up." Angela offered. She grabbed Jane's hands and gently pulled her to her feet. Jane winced and pressed a hand to her stomach.

"Janie, are you sure you're ok? I mean, you did have a bad fall. And that looks like some bruising that is starting to come out." Angela said.

"Ma, can you please not do this now? I'm standing here naked, in nothing but a towel. I'll be fine to at least get dressed on my own. I promise I'll call you if something else happens or if I need help. Can I just have a few minutes on my own please?" Jane begged. Angela noticed the tiredness in her voice and reluctantly nodded her head.

Ok. But if you're not out in ten minutes, I'm coming in." Angela threatened before leaving Jane alone in the bathroom. She went back into the kitchen, then gasped as she saw the stove dangerously smoking. She rushed over and switched the heat off, the bacon burnt to a crisp. But that was the last thing on Angela's mind at the moment.

* * *

An hour passed by before Jane was feeling herself again. Her mum had cooked bunny pancakes and had salvaged whatever she could of the bacon, and had squeezed them some fresh orange juice. Afterwards they had sat on the couch and talked lightly for a while, which Jane had to admit was nice. She missed moments like these, where she could just and talk and laugh with her Ma, with Maura, even with Frankie sometimes (although that was only if she was feeling particularly nice). Plus, it had helped her to relax a bit after whatever it was that had happened earlier that morning. Jane wasn't ready to talk properly about it yet, she was still digesting it herself and Angela understood, thankfully.

It was nine am on a Saturday morning and Jane didn't have any therapy today, just her home exercises which she would later in the afternoon when Angela went to visit Maura. Jane would give anything to go with her, but she also knew that she and Maura weren't ready to see each other just yet. Another couple of days, and hopefully they would be ready to talk then. No, Jane was having a total rest free day, for once. She was about to get up to offer her mum some more juice or coffee when her mobile rang. Maura's contact photo appeared and she grinned, feeling instantly happier.

"Hey Maur!" Jane answered. Angela looked at her with a raised eyebrow from the couch. Jane ignored it and walked into the kitchen.

"Hey, Jane. Listen, there's something I have to tell you. But…I want you to sit down first. Is your mum home?" Maura asked. Jane frowned at the quiet yet tense tone of Maura's voice. Confused, she replied.

"Yeah Maur, Ma's with me. Do you want me to go into my bedroom?" Jane offered, sensing a private conversation was about to be had.

"Yes please, Jane."

"Ok, just give me a quick sec." Jane put the phone to her chest. "Hey Ma, I'm just going to my room for a few minutes to talk to Maura. Do you want me to boil the kettle for another hot drink?" She shouted into the living room.

"No thanks Janie. I'm ok. Maybe in a couple of hours." Came Angela's response. Jane placed her own mug in the sink before putting the phone back to her ear and walking to the bedroom. Closing the door behind her, she sat down on the end of the bed.

"Ok, Maur. I'm in my bedroom, with the door closed, sitting on the bed. What's up?" Jane asked. On the other end of the line, Maura flinched slightly at the casualness of Jane's tone. What she was about to tell her was going to be tough, and would probably ruin her day. But Maura couldn't keep this to herself; it was too much to bear, and Jane had trusted telling her when her father had come to see her at the hospital. So now it was time for Maura to show that same trust also.

"Jane…Doyle came to see me earlier today." Maura blurted out. Jane, for her part, became instantly alert and wary.

"What? Why? Did he hurt you?" Jane fired.

"No, Jane, I'm fine. He didn't hurt me. I went down to the hospital newsagency in search of a decent science journal to read, and on my way back up he pulled me into an empty room to speak to me, privately." Maura explained. Silence from Jane.

"Jane?"

"Yeah, I'm here. What did he want to talk to you about?"

"About…about your father. Apparently he contacted Doyle, asking for his help if you don't agree to help him within the next two days. He knows what your father is involved in, but he wouldn't tell me. He just wanted to pass on the message that he had been contacted." Maura said. Jane sat stock still, in shock. Why now? Why today? Why did everything happen at once? Why could they never get a break and why, out of millions and millions of people, did they have to be the ones who always go caught up in everything, whether they wanted to be or not?

"Maur, have you told anyone else this yet?" Jane asked. It was the only she could think of to say out loud that wouldn't send her into another breakdown, after this morning.

"No, not yet. I went straight back to my room when he left and called you straight away. I felt you should know as soon as possible. I'm sorry, Jane. I shouldn't have called." Maura said.

"No, its fine. Maur. I'm glad you called. I would rather find out from you than from anyone else. Just don't tell anyone yet until I…until _we_ figure out what to do."

"Ok, Jane."

"By the way, did Doyle say how my father contacted him?"

"All he said was that your father was an 'old contact', although I don't know what he means by that." Maura explained.

"Hmm. That's weird. I'll check it out later." Jane paused, wondering how to phrase her next question. "How are you holding up? I mean, I know I only saw you yesterday." Jane chuckled a little at what she had said. On the other end, Maura smiled. It was good to hear Jane laugh a little.

"I'm ok. Been better, though. I think I need to try meditating again. I haven't done it for a while, but it might relax me. I might even start thinking of booking some yoga classes for when I get released from the hospital. It is very therapeutic, you know. Maybe I can book a class for the two of us, on a day when we both don't have therapy. They have this lovely couples class which I have wanted to try for a while…"

"Maura! It's ok. I think I'll pass on the yoga and meditation for now." Jane said. It had turned, somehow, to a light hearted conversation, but there was still some tension between them, even over the phone. Jane debated whether or not now was a good time to tell Maura about what had happened that morning, but the decision was made for her.

"I'm sorry Jane, but I have to go. The nurses are doing their rounds, and I've got my daily check-up now. But I'll talk to you later, ok? I love you." Maura said, then held her breath for Jane's reply.

"Ok, Maur. I'll talk to you later. Love you too." Jane responded, then hung up. She put her head in her hands and breathed deeply. She needed to tell someone else about this, they needed help, but she couldn't tell Ma and she couldn't go to the BPD directly, it would cause too many complications at this stage. She couldn't tell Tommy, because he would probably flip out and tell Ma. So then who? Korsak and Frost, she couldn't tell because then they would have to tell Cavanaugh. _Ma, no way. She would freak out too much and her heart has been broken enough. Maura already knows, obviously. So that leaves…_ Frankie. But what would she say? How could she tell her younger brother something like this? What was _she_ going to do? And what about Maura? Maura said she was ok on the phone, but Jane knew her better than that. Her tone of voice and the way she spoke told a different story. Maura was seriously freaked out, and even though she was keeping a calm composure at the moment, Jane was afraid that Maura was going to break any minute. _Like you did today, and when your father visited you…_ Jane put her hands to ears and shook her head. She had to stop thinking stuff like this, or it really would drive her insane. She couldn't call Frankie just yet; she needed some more time to think and she also needed privacy to tell him, but she couldn't leave the house without Angela going with her. So the only option then was to wait until Angela went to see Maura, then she would call Frankie to see if he could come over. Sighing at yet having to lie to her mother, _again_ , Jane stood up and left the bedroom to re-join her mother and try to pretend that nothing else was wrong. Which was going to be almost impossible.


	11. Chapter 11

**So. Hey. If there are any readers still out there, I know that a sorry isn't enough, but even so I am sorry. I don't have a good enough excuse for leaving it so long to update. I have actually had this chapter written for a while, I just wanted to figure out the next chapter before I posted it and I think I have. I know that's still not good enough, but at least I'm updating right? This story is always on my mind and I am always thinking of ideas for it, I will finish it, that I promise you. And to everyone who has reviewed, and especially those who asked me to keep going with it I thank you. You guys prompted me to actually start working on this story again. So with that said, here we go! I hope you enjoy this chapter, and even if you don't, thank you for reading anyway :)**

 **Chapter 11:**

Twelve o'clock came around quickly after Maura called Jane. One of the day nurses came to escort Maura to the rehab facility at the hospital, where she would be spending the next two hours. When Maura came back to her room afterwards, she was utterly exhausted and worn out. She wanted nothing more than to just lie down and rest for a few hours, but she still had to get ready for her psychologist appointment in an hour.

Maura stepped into the shower and let the hot water run over, soothing her muscles. She flinched slightly when it hit too hard on her abdomen and she closed her eyes, gently brushing her fingers against the scars. There were so many of them. Maura knew that some would fade with time, but there were still a good portion that would most likely be with her forever. She didn't stop the tears that fell down her cheeks, mingling with the water. Suddenly it felt like everything was too much and she slid down the wall and sat there, hugging her knees and crying into her arms. When she had decided, years ago, on her career path Maura had never, ever imagined that it would lead to the life that she was living now. She loved science, and she loved her career, the people that she worked with, the science and equipment and facilities that she had daily access to and she loved the work itself, of being able to literally speak for the dead and play an instrumental role in working out their stories so that they could see justice. But was it worth all the heartache, drama and danger that the job came with?

A knock on the bathroom door startled Maura and she shot to her feet, quickly wiping her eyes. She turned the shower off and stepped out, wrapping a towel around herself.

"Yes?" Maura called.

"Just checking that you are ok, Dr Isles." Maura breathed a sigh of relief that it was just the nurse.

"Thank you, but I'm ok."

"Alright. Call if you need anything. I'll be back in a half hour to take you to see your psychologist." The nurse called through the closed door. Maura sighed again and quickly dried off before changing into a clean pair of yoga pants and a t-shirt, not even daring to look at her reflection in the mirror.

Maura sat stiffly on the edge of the couch, her hands folded neatly in her lap. Her psychologist, Kelsie, sat opposite her in an armchair with a notebook open on her lap. They were already half way through the session but Maura had become increasingly uncomfortable and silent since the start. Her level of unease was unusual for Maura compared to what Kelsie had observed in their previous appointments and the both of them were aware of it. Kelsie sighed and turned to put her notebook on her desk. She placed her hands over Maura's.

"Maura," Kelsie started, and waited for Maura to finally acknowledge her before continuing. "I know this is hard for you. I know how overwhelmed you are probably feeling and I know…"

"No you don't know!" Maura uncharacteristically shouted, leaping to her feet. Kelsie reeled back, surprised, but didn't say anything. "You have no idea! How could you possibly know what I am feeling? I know a lot of the science behind psychology and I have read a lot of studies that cover almost all aspects of it. But one thing I have noticed is that none of it explains how a person can justify their claims at knowing the situations of their clients! You don't know and you will never know because you have never been in this position! How can you know the anger I am feeling? How can you sit there and assume that you know what it is like to have the woman that you love watch you being tortured? I was…I don't even know what I was…barely alive would be the most accurate description, even though it is not one hundred percent scientifically accurate." Maura paused for breath and flopped back down on the couch, resting her head in her hands. She took a few deep, calming breaths to gather her thoughts. Kelsie didn't move or say anything; she knew that she needed to give Maura space to let her express anything that she needed, or wanted, to.

Maura lifted her head up and continued to talk. "I was so scared," She whispered. "But I wasn't thinking about myself, or the fact that I was slowly being killed. I was scared for Jane. Scared that if I died she wouldn't be able to continue living. I was afraid that she would give up on everything and I knew that for the rest of her life, Jane would have blamed herself for my death. She blames herself even now for letting me get hurt. She hasn't said anything, but I know she's thinking it. If I had died, nothing anyone could have said or done would have convinced her otherwise. And you know what the worst part was?" Maura asked and looked at Kelsie, her eyes red rimmed as she started crying.

Kelsie shook her head as she replied softly. "What was the worst part?"

"That in that moment, with Jane screaming at Hoyt to stop as he continued to hurt me, I thought that I was going to die. And if I died, then I would have never had the chance to tell Jane that I loved her." Maura said, her voice cracking. She buried her head in her hands again and started sobbing, her shoulders shaking. Kelsie moved to sit on the couch next to Maura. She didn't know if it was welcomed or not, but when Kelsie placed a comforting arm around her shoulders, Maura didn't shake her off.

"I had a breakdown in the shower earlier, just before I came here." Maura said, not daring to look at Kelsie, who raised an eyebrow.

"Why did you breakdown Maura? Was it the emotional stress from your encounter with Hoyt? Was it worry for and thoughts of Jane? Or was it a combination?" Kelsie asked. She had a fairly good idea already but she wanted Maura to think about it and to try to come to terms with it herself.

Maura sighed as more tears flowed down her cheeks and dripped off her chin, but she didn't care for once. Why did she have that breakdown? It was because she was overwhelmed and stressed. Wasn't it?

"Maura, honey, come on. Tell me what you're thinking." Kelsie pushed gently.

"I…I don't know. I keep thinking that it was a combination of everything, that I was stressed and overwhelmed by it all but now I am not so sure. I feel like there was…is…something else that is bothering me, but I cannot figure it out." Maura answered. Kelsie glanced at the clock on the wall and noticed that, unfortunately, their time was up. She squeezed Maura's shoulders before getting up and sitting back down in the armchair. Maura didn't even notice her movements until Kelsie placed her hands over hers again. Maura glanced up, slightly startled. Kelsie gave her a small smile.

"Our time is up for today Maura. But when you see Jane next I want you to talk about some of the things you have told me today. You don't have to tell her everything if you don't want to, but I think that you two need to start talking about some of these feelings and…reservations, for want of a better word." Kelsie said and waited until Maura had nodded before continuing.

"I'm not going to give you anything else to do today, because I feel that is enough and will be a challenge in its own right. But I will give you this piece of advice; if you are having breakdowns and nightmares, then it is very probable that Jane is as well. There are probably moments that she hasn't told you about either. When you are both ready, I believe that it would benefit you both to talk about this as well. But that can wait for another day if it becomes too much." Kelsie explained. Maura nodded again and released her hands from under Kelsie's, sitting up straight and wiping her eyes dry with a tissue that Kelsie had provided. Kelsie stood up first and held a hand out to Maura, who gratefully accepted and let herself be pulled to her feet.

"Thank you, Kelsie." Maura said sincerely. Kelsie smiled.

"You're welcome. Now go back to your room and get some rest. You look like you need it." Kelsie said as she followed Maura out. Maura turned back and said goodbye before walking out, towards the elevators with her day nurse. Kelsie watched her go with a pensive expression. Both Maura and Jane were strong women, there was no doubt about that. But they still had unresolved issues that stemmed back a fair way, and it was going to be a while before Kelsie was finished with them.

Maura sat on her bed, watching the local news. No mention of any murders and Maura sighed, silently hoping that the precinct didn't pick up any new cases. Dr Pike was on call and she really didn't want him working at the morgue or the labs until she was cleared for work again. Getting restless, Maura retrieved her journal from the bedside table and scanned her latest entry. She sighed and flicked over to the next blank page. She had just started to write when a knock on the door startled her and she quickly shoved the notebook back in the draw.

"Come in." She said.

"Hey Maura. I just thought I would drop by and see how you were going." Angela said as she stepped into the room. Maura smiled at her.

"Hi Angela, thank you. That is very sweet of you." Maura said as Angela placed a vase of her favourite flowers on the side table.

"How have you been? Are you doing ok?" Angela asked as she sat down in the guest chair.

"I am doing better." Maura replied.

"That's good."

The two women talked lightly for a while, with both needing the relief the afternoon of smiles and laughter brought. After a few hours, Angela got up to leave, wanting to get back home to Jane.

"Thank you for coming Angela. I truly had a good time." Maura said. Angela squeezed her hand and gave her a soft, motherly kiss on the forehead.

"Your welcome sweetie. And try not to worry too much. Everything is going to work out, even if it takes longer than you expected it to." Angela said. She gave Maura a smile before walking out, closing the door behind her. Maura stared at the door, thinking about Angela's words. They hadn't really talked about anything too emotional or stressful, yet somehow Angela had known what Maura was thinking in a way that very much resembled Jane. Some would call it mother's instincts but others would say like mother, like daughter.

Earlier in the afternoon, when Angela left to see Maura, Jane called Frankie and asked if he could come over. Less than an hour later, the two Rizzoli siblings were sitting on Jane's couch, a beer in Frankie's hand. Jane looked wistfully at the beer and sighed. Frankie noticed and chuckled slightly.

"It won't be long. You're already out of the hospital, the stab wound is healing nicely and you are recovering quicker than what anyone expects you to. Soon you will be off the meds and then you can drink again."

"Yeah, I know. But it still sucks." Jane whined. "But there is something I need to talk to you about it, and you're not going to like it."

Frankie raised an eyebrow and set his beer down on the coffee table. "What is it? Do I have to arrest someone?"

"Not yet," Jane smiled slightly at him. "But…it's to do with Dad."

 ** _Thirty minutes later_**

"SON OF A BITCH!" Frankie yelled and he stood up, followed by Jane. 8

"Frankie, calm down. We'll work this out." She said, placing a hand on his arm. He whirled around to face her.

"I'm sorry Jane, but what the hell is wrong with him? It's not right that he disappeared, deserting Ma in the process and then he just shows up, expecting you to forgive and forget? It's downright insane! He has no right to do this to you, to us." Frankie said. He flopped back onto the couch and rested his head in his hands. Jane slowly sat down beside him and placed a comforting hand on his back.

"I know Frankie, believe me. But we need your help. If we believe what Doyle and Dad have said, then Maura is in more danger than us. Doyle is an Irish mob boss, and one of the biggest in the city. If he is getting involved in this, then whoever he is fighting might be cruel enough to go after Maura because she is his daughter." Jane explained. Frankie sighed and nodded, turning to look at Jane. Their eyes met and Frankie saw the worry in his sister's eyes.

"Like Hoyt." He whispered. Jane gulped and nodded, closing her eyes against the emotions that suddenly flooded her. She felt Frankie move beside her and felt his arm around her shoulder. She leaned her head against his shoulder and opened her eyes, staring at the coffee table. Frankie kissed the top of her head gently.

"Whatever is going on, none of those guys are Hoyt, Jane. Nothing is going to happen to Maura again; anyone who is smart won't try anything against her, or you." Frankie removed his arm to let Jane sit up. He looked her directly in the eyes.

"Today is Saturday; Dad has given you until Monday, that is two days from now, to answer him. What are our options?" Frankie asked. He knew exactly what their options were, but he wanted to give Jane a chance to think about if for herself; he knew that it would give her something to focus on.

"Ok, well I can call Dad and agree to helping him but that would mean that if he got me involved in anything too illegal, then we would have to tell Cavanaugh. Or I could tell him no and see what happens, but that might mean putting Maura and myself in even more danger." Jane said.

"Is that it?" Frankie asked. Jane looked at him with sad eyes.

"No. There is a third option. We tell Korsak and Cavanaugh, but that would mean telling Ma as well and…and possibly arresting Dad."

She opened her eyes to find him gone. She looked behind her, over the couch and saw Frankie gathering his keys. She stood up to see him out. He saw the uncertainty and unspoken question in his sister's eyes.

"I'll help you Jane. How could I not? Our scumbag of a father is once again making a scene that could harm us and the people we love," He said, his tone dead serious. Jane half smiled to herself that he felt the same way as her. "We'll work out a plan of attack in the next couple of days."

"Frankie, just…don't tell Tommy. Not yet. We need to keep this on a need-to-know basis only," Jane said. Frankie nodded. "Thank you, Frankie. I mean it." She said and wrapped him up in a hug. He hugged her tightly back. After a few seconds they parted and Frankie smiled at her.

"Everything is going to be alright, Janie." He said before closing the door behind him. Jane sighed as she locked it before wandering back over to the couch and flicking on the TV, wishing that she could believe him.


	12. Chapter 12

**Hey guys. Can I just say, I have still been getting reviews throughout the whole year for this story. I cannot express how incredible that is, considering I have been so so slack in updating continuing this story. But for those of you who have asked me to continue this story, I have decided to. I have read and seen all of you reviews and thank you to each and every one of you who asked me to continue and who liked it. Here it is, here we go again, and if anyone wants a refresher or a 'recap' of what has happened so far please let me know :)**

 **Hope you guys like it! :D**

 **Chapter 12:**

Maura woke up in a cold sweat. She closed her eyes and tried to steady her breathing, holding a hand to her chest as she calmed herself down. She breathed in deeply, trying to forget her nightmare and opened her eyes. Maura stood up and opened the hospital curtains covering the window, squinting slightly as her eyes adjusted to the morning sun. She watched the people who were already on the lawn; patients, nurses, families and friends who had come to visit early. Maura sighed. What it would be like to be a normal citizen, to have a normal life? Maura was aware that most workers in her and Jane's profession did not face the drama and the trouble that they seemed to attract. For some reason offenders loved to go after them and Maura could not figure out what it was about them, or Boston, specifically.

She sighed, turning away from the window and headed into the bathroom for a shower. _Thinking about that will not help you right now. Besides, it is way too early,_ Maura thought. She glanced at the clock as she passed it and realised that it was quite late. At least for her, anyway. 8:30 the digital clock blinked at her. Under normal circumstances she would be at home, already dressed and starting to prepare Sunday brunch with Angela and Jane for their weekly family gathering. Just one month. How much had changed in so little time.

* * *

The nurse came in a few minutes later for a routine check on Maura. Once the nurse was assured that she was ok and didn't need assistance in the shower, Maura took a long, hot shower and revelled in the soothing feeling of the hot water on her body. Afterwards, when she was dressed in a casual pair of leggings and a plain t-shirt, she sat on her bed, lost and confused. She wanted, no _needed_ Jane to be with her, even though it had barely been a day. But she missed the support and comfort that Jane gave her, especially when she was at a loss for what to do with herself. She sighed and checked the time. It was barely ten am. What was she supposed to do to fill the time? What could she do to take her mind off all the swirling thoughts and questions that were constantly going through her brain? She felt restless and impatient, not just from her current inability to do any sort of work, but also from all the emotions and feelings that she felt with everything that was happening. She could try some meditation to calm down, but she didn't think that the current physical condition of her body would allow her to attempt it. Absently she ran a hand over her stomach, lightly grazing the scars that were still there. It was a habit that she had gotten into lately whenever she was feeling a negative emotion. She was hoping to go home on Friday, but if Maura was being honest with herself she didn't know if she would be mentally ready to leave. Plus, she still had things to work out with Jane; god, there was so much. Maura started at the knock on the door.

"Come in!" She called. The door opened slowly and Hope poked her head in.

"Is this a bad time?

"No, not at all. Please come in." Maura said. Inside, she was reeling. While Maura knew she was being completely irrational, she couldn't shake the feeling that something was up. Something that she wasn't going to like, especially after Hope's last visit. She watched as Hope sat down on the chair next to her bed.

"How are you Maura?" Hope asked. Maura didn't miss the nervousness that flashed quickly across Hope's face.

"I'm doing alright. My recovery is going well, and I should be going home by the end of the week." Maura answered. Hope nodded, but didn't say anything else. There were a few moments of awkward silence before Hope took a deep breath. Maura braced herself.

"Maura, I came here to…"

"Don't." Maura said, raising a hand to stop her. "Don't say anything, please. I can already tell that whatever you have to tell me isn't good, especially since this visit is so close to your last visit, but now isn't the best time and I would appreciate it if you could respect that." Hope opened and closed her mouth, thinking.

"Maura, what I have to say is important. Please, hear me out. I know that you have a lot going on, what with recent events and all. But I also know that Paddy came to see you." Hope started. Maura gaped at her, questions starting to flood her mind. Hope eyed her warily for a moment before deciding it was safe to continue.

"He contacted me right after he left the hospital and filled me in on everything. Maura, this is much bigger than what you think. I don't know if Jane is planning on helping her father or not, but I am not sure that it is wise for her to try. She is already involved and may not know it yet. All three of us are worried about her safety and, consequently, yours…"

"STOP!" Maura yelled, covering her ears with her hands. She closed her eyes and took three deep breaths before slowly uncovering her ears. Hope looked slightly shocked at her outburst, but remained quiet.

"What do you mean, 'the three of us'?" Maura asked in a low, dangerous tone.

"Paddy, Jane's father and myself." Hope said quietly.

"Why would you include yourself in that count if you weren't already involved before Doyle contacted you?" Hope's silence was all the response that Maura needed.

"I want you to get out. _Now._ And don't come back unless you are here with genuine means." Maura said, pointing to the door. Hope nodded and left without saying anything. One the door had closed Maura tried to calm down, a million thoughts running through her head, but failed and broke down in tears instead. _I can't do this. I can't. Why me? Why Jane? Out of everyone in the world, why is it always us that are targeted? I can't do this._ Maura repeated this like a mantra, over and over in her head as the tears racked her body and as she gasped for breath. Her stomach was hurting a lot now, but Maura didn't care as everything finally caught up with her.

 _Calm down Maura, calm down. You're ok. Take some deep breaths._ Maura thought as she tried to console herself. Eventually she did manage to calm down, but her mind was still whirring. But mostly she just felt angry. Angry at Hope for getting involved in the first place and making Maura feel this way, angry at Doyle for agreeing to help Jane's father and angry at Frank Sr. Angry at him for pretending to care about Jane and her family, angry at him for involving more people than just himself in _his_ issues and problems, and angry at him for taking advantage of Jane and Maura's situation. _No,_ Maura decided. She didn't care what Frank Sr. had said to Jane or any threats that may have been implied, Jane was _not_ going to help her father. She couldn't. Could she?

"I need to talk to Jane." Maura whispered softly to herself. _No, I need Jane with me._ She amended in her head as more silent tears trickled down her cheeks. She picked up her phone off the bedside table and sent Jane a quick text, asking her to come and see Maura when Jane was next at the hospital for her therapy.

* * *

Jane groaned and slapped her alarm clock, almost knocking it off the bedside table. She rolled over to face the other way and buried her head back into her pillows, not wanting to face the day yet. It was Sunday, and even though she didn't have to go anywhere she still had to figure out what to do about her idiot father.

She had almost fallen sleep again when a knock on the door and the sound of footsteps on the carpet caught her attention.

"Janie, I made you breakfast. Also your phone rang, but I didn't get to it in time." He mother said and Jane felt the weight of the bed shift slightly as Angela sat down on the end of it. Groaning Jane turned over and sat up, rubbing the sleep out of her eyes. Confused Jane glanced at her bedside table and then the phone in her mother's hand.

"I thought I left my mobile next to my clock when I went to bed last night?" Jane muttered groggily. Angela shrugged.

"I found it on the kitchen bench." Angela replied as she handed the phone over. Jane checked the missed call, frowning when she saw Korsak's name. She also grinned slightly when she saw that she had an unopened text from Maura, but she decided to wait until her mother wasn't there to open it. She tapped Korsak's number instead and waited for it to dial.

"It was Korsak that called." She told her mother as she waited for Korsak to pick up.

"Why would he be calling you on a Sunday?" Angela asked, confusion on her face. 'You're not even on call, you're still on leave."

"Hello?" Jane heard Korsak say as he picked up.

"Korsak? Hey, you tried to call me."

"Yeah…I know you're on leave, but Cavanaugh wants you to come in tomorrow at a time that suits you."

"Ok," Jane said, her eyebrows creasing at the hesitant tone of Korsak's voice, "what is it you're not telling me, Korsak? Why does Cavanaugh want me to go into the precinct? He would never ask someone who got injured on the job to come in when they're still recovering, he has shown that on more than one occasion. So why does he want me there?" Jane asked. She heard Korsak take a deep breath before he spoke.

"Jane, it's to do with your father. I'm not supposed to be telling you this, but Cavanaugh, he…he received a message. I can't say anymore, but…"

"Yeah, don't worry Korsak, I get it. I'll be in at around ten tomorrow morning." Jane heard Korsak sigh in relief, or worry. Which one, she wasn't quite sure.

"Ok, thanks Jane. And hey, how are you holding up? You doing ok, kid?" Korsak asked. He was worried about her, and about Maura as well. Not just about their physical health, but he could tell that they were both struggling mentally as well.

"Yeah, I'm doing alright. Coping, you know?" Jane replied. She knew that Korsak would get what she meant and wouldn't ask further questions.

"I know, yeah. I'll see you tomorrow then. Get some rest today and look after yourself." Korsak said and hung up. Jane sat back against the pillows in her bed and sighed, looking at her mother wearily. Should she tell her mother about her ex-husband? Jane wondered. Was it the right time, and does she need to know? Or rather, does her mother have a right to know? _Yes_ , Jane's mind answered. _Yes, she does have a right to know._

"Janie? Are you ok?" Angela asked, placing a gentle hand on her daughter's knee. "You have a weird look on your face and you're staring at me."

"Huh? Oh right. Yeah, I'm ok, Ma. Just thinking. Cavanaugh wants me to go in tomorrow, I think he wants to go over some of the insurance details and how long I'll be on leave for." Jane replied.

"Ok, then. I'll drive you in and wait for you in the café, alright?" Angela offered, and Jane nodded. "I'll leave you to get dressed then, come outside when you're ready and I'll fix us some breakfast." She patted her daughter's knee being standing up and walking out, closing the bedroom door behind her. Jane put her head back and sighed, almost bursting into tears. She hated lying to her mother like that, she should've told her. But she didn't have the balls to do so, and Jane felt like a coward because of it. She didn't want to bring any more people into it than she had to, though. She was not going to put anyone else danger because of her stupid mistakes. _Like Maura._

Jane shook her head to try to clear her thoughts before opening the text from Maura.

Are you coming in for therapy tomorrow? I need to talk to you about something. Also, I miss you and love you 3

Jane smiled and almost laughed. Trust Maura to be so formal in a text. She sent back a reply.

Hey gorgeous, I'm coming in tomorrow around lunchtime. I'll definitely stop by ? Love you and miss you too 3

Jane put her phone down and then had a quick shower before joining her mother for breakfast.

* * *

At the hospital, Maura read Jane's text and smiled. No matter what mood she was in, Jane always managed to make her smile. That was just one of the reasons why she loved her so much.


End file.
